


"More than JUST Brothers?”

by Nightgirl08



Series: My uglydolls fics [2]
Category: UglyDolls (2019)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Brotherly Love, Drama, Eventual Happy Ending, Eventual Romance, F/F, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Infidelity, LGBTQ Themes, Love Triangles, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Romance, Secret Relationship, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-09
Updated: 2020-08-07
Packaged: 2021-03-01 00:35:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 23,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23086387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nightgirl08/pseuds/Nightgirl08
Summary: (Originally posted on wattpad. Username is Annoyingsister2004 if you want to check out my other stories.)They were once brothers, even more than that. But can the furture see them ever together again? Let's find out.
Relationships: Kitty/Lydia/Tuesday (UglyDolls), Lou/Nolan (UglyDolls), Lou/Ox (UglyDolls), Mandy/Moxy (UglyDolls), Meghan/Michael (UglyDolls), Michael/Nolan (UglyDolls), Ox/Luckybat (Uglydolls)
Series: My uglydolls fics [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1603930
Comments: 6
Kudos: 22





	1. The past

**Author's Note:**

> Hey ya'll this is originally part of my oneshots, but I decided to make it into a fic! Hope you enjoy the chapter! Comment and kudos if you like it!

_ Reputation _

_ /r _ _ ɛ _ _ pj _ _ ʊˈ _ _ te _ _ ɪʃ _ _ (ə)n/ _

_ Noun _

_ 1\. the beliefs or opinions that are generally held about someone or something. _

_2\. a widespread belief that someone or something has a particular characteristic_.

Reputation is important in his home. In the place, it defines who you are. It defines what you become.

 ** _It defines what others expect or think of you_**.

Day one of everyday is the same. Wake up, go teach, be perfect, go asleep.

 _Everyday is practically the same_.

It was routine. A dull, boring routine. But he had to do it to not let others find about his reputation wavering ever so slightly.

He was head of this damn place, he was the leader, his reputation mattered most.

The suns shines through the window to make its presence known. He just ignores it.

He doesn't feel like getting up.

He lays on his bed just after a session of love making with the doll in front of him.

Nolan opens his eyes. "Morning, Lou."

His green eye shines above the other.

For a moment, he doesn't see Nolan. He sees **_him_**.

_"Morning, Lou."_

_"Morning,_ **_Ox_ ** _."_

But that doesn't come out of his mouth. This does.

"Morning, Nolan."

The name felt wrong to use, but it was right in the eyes of others. The bed seems to squeak from the others presence, it always did.

_But never around_ **_him._ **

He doesn't dare mention his name though, there are consequences if he does.

He is exhausted to get up, but there are no lazy mornings here.

_"Hey, Lou?"_

_"Yes?"_

_He feels an arm snake its way around his waist._

_"Why don't you stay for a bit longer?"_

_"You know I ain't lazy, Ox."_

_"I know, but you can be for once, can't you?"_

Nolan's caress in his face brings him back to reality.

"Get up." He pats his face enthusiastically. "You have dolls to lead, you know this. You don't want your reputation getting sloppy, do we?"

_"Reputation doesn't matter, it_ **_can_ ** _be_ **_sloppy_ ** _."_

_"Your clearly are new, ain't you?"_

Nolan's eyes become visible to Lou again, he is brought from his daydream.

"What is wrong with you?"

He blinks once, then he blinks twice. "...Nothing, I just have a headache."

"...Understandable." Nolan replies. "The new batch are a nuisance. We just have to hope they pass quickly so we can be rid of them."

_Ox smiles at dolls around him. "I hope we all pass to make it to the big world."_

_"Yeah, I guess we all_ **_nearly_ ** _can."_

Lou sighs. "Yeah."

He doesn't move due to the feeling in his body. He doesn't feel that well.

But he laments to Nolan's wishes and gets up.

His body however has other wishes, it feels heavy. Like something was pulling it down.

Nolan hugs him from behind. "Are you not feeling well?"

He doesn't respond.

_"Lou, are you sure that your feeling well?"_

_"Yeah, Ox." He smiled. "Just fine."_

In this case, Lou doesn't. His vision is blurry, and he barley feels himself being helped to the living room.

He sits on the couch, and Nolan puts a hand on his knee. "Are you sure that your alright?"

He sighs again, and puts his head in his hands. "Shut up, I said that I'm fine."

His eyes widen as he looks at the other's face, fear strikes Lou's core. He had said those words.

_"Shut up."_

Nolan's eyes narrow, but then they do back to normal. "I guess that you aren't feeling well if your acting like this. I'll go to the girls to get your medicine after."

He nods. "...That's fine."

His medicine, he needs it. He isn't perfect without it. The thing removes any imperfections from him inside and out.

Nolan makes eye contact with him. "Is **_he_** haunting your thoughts again?"

Lou doesn't say anything, he can't when his mind is constantly thinking about him. 

When they had met, everything they shared, everything Lou and Ox had to keep as secret.

Nolan's lips even feel like Ox's. That's why he keeps him around, he reminds him of the other in so many ways.

But it seems like he's established some type of role in his life. Like a boyfriend.

Perfection has nothing against gays, bisexuals, lesbians, etc. Hell, there are more of them than straights.

But they have a rule against another type of dolls.

They are named **_Uglydolls_**.

_"Do you accept me for who I am, Lou?" His breath husks his ear, and he stands on his lap with this hands on his chest. "Do you love me for what I am?"_

_"I do." He responds in genuine truth. "Do you accept me?"_

_Ox chuckles, and their lips almost connect. "Is that even a needed question?"_

_His blush appears on his face right away, and the other doll chuckles._

**_Their lips connect_**.

Nolan's dominate his, and he moans. It was good.

_Ox's is better._

The thought is dismissed right away. He isn't allowed to think such foolish things.

**_Nolan's is amazing._ **

Lou opens his eyes for a second, and notices the other on his lap.

_Like_ **_he_ ** _used to._

That was before the event happened, before things had gone into a catastrophe. Before his reputation and significant other threatened.

_Thank god that choices exist._

Nolan gets out a random something. "Here, have a drink."

Lou nods, he could use it. "Okay."

He sips it, but something isn't right. It's...bitter, it doesn't taste nutritious. Like it was the opposite.

"It's your medicine."

His eyes widen. "..I...not...meant...early...."

Jealousy has ruled this action, Nolan knew it. But some things needed to be erased.

Lou feels his mind spinning, then feels something disappears.

 _Memories_.

He feels them going into a tight cocoon and going somewhere he can't access. He doesn't know where they go though, it's his mind.

But they are certain ones, knowing ones, precious ones.

His memories of Ox.

 _It's the price_.

Nolan seems to grin as he sees them disappearing in his eyes.

_He walked up to her door of the other's house, and sighed._

_"I'm sorry." His voice shook, even though he wasn't speaking to Ox directly. "I'm so sorry."_

_His phone rings, and he answers._

_"Hello?"_

_"_ _ Are you there? _ _"_

_Silence, but then a hesitant answer. "Yes."_

_"_ _ You understand what you need to do? _ _"_

_"Make him leave and never be with him. He is a threat to perfection and my reputation."_

_"_ _ Good, your useful at something. Your lucky that nobody else knows of your little... _ **_ stunt _ ** _."_

_"I am."_

_"_ _ Follow orders, and you will stay as leader. _ _"_

_The phone hung up, and he puts it away. Lucky that Lou had the bully excuse._

_He went in the door as he knew Ox would asleep._

_As he approached him, he found that his suspicions were true. The doll truly was lazy, it was cute._

**_It was now or never_ ** _._

_"Hey, little bunny." A nickname invented by time. "Hey, Oxie, wake up."_

_He groans. "L-Lou?"_

_He sits up and rubs his eyes._

_"Am I late for training again?!"_

_His face names him chuckle. "No, but I have surprise for you."_

_It's the only way Lou knows how to put it. But it's the opposite of a good surprise._

_At least for him it is._

_"What is it?!" Ox asks excitedly. "Are we going to go to our spot again?!"_

_Lou's hand is grabbed, and Ox nuzzles his nose to his, he's lucky they're alone._

_Lou restrains himself. "Something like that, I figured out a way to help with the bullying."_

_"What is it?"_

_He smiles thinly. "Follow me."_

_Ox does as he trusts his_ **_boyfriend_ ** _. The one who held actual compassion for him._

_They arrive at the pipes._

_"There's a place that you can go." Lou feels his throat choking on the lie. "You can be free of the torment here."_

_He feels the tears in his eyes, they burn his sight. But he doesn't let them fall, Ox can't see him like this._

_"But I'll be away from you." Ox protests, and grabs Lou's hand. "_ **_I love you, Lou._ ** _"_

_He smiles brokenly. "_ **_I love you to, Oxie._ ** _But this is good. And besides, you can always come and visit."_

_"True." His eyes light up. "That is true! That's perfect, Lou."_

_No, Lou really isn't. If he is perfect, he would be able to handle this smoothly. Instead, he has to do_ **_this_ ** _._

_"Thanks, little bunny." He chuckles. "It means a lot."_

_It really did mean a lot._

_"I promise to visit." His lips hovered just inches from his. "Thanks for this, Lou."_

_Their lips crash together, and Lou feels his heart swell. At least life allowed him one last chance to feel loved._

_He brings the doll closer, and he is soon sitting in his lap. Their lips are together more, and they soon start getting lost in each other._

_Lou_ _h_ _ums in contentment, he allows himself to be selfish this once. To indulge one last time in_ **_his_ ** _doll._

_Eventually, he pulls away. "Get going, Ox you have a long journey ahead!"_

_He starts walking down the pipe. "Love you, Lou! I promise to visit."_

_Lou believes him. "Love you to, Oxie."_

_He smiles even if his heart is breaking into pieces._

_At least the factory will be satisfied now._

Loublinks awake and sees himself on his couch. He rubs his head.

_Who and what was that?_

He doesn't know why he dreamed of that. The figure is blurry.

His shoulders are grabbed, and he hears a familiar voice ask. "Are you okay, Lou?"

"Yeah, Kitty." He replies. "W-where's Nolan?"

He feels instinctual worry for not seeing his real boyfriend there.

"I'm here." Nolan reassures. "What did you dream about?"

He rubs his head. "Some green bunny doll. An ugly."

"What happened?"

"I showed him out the institute, but then he kissed me." His tone is disgusted. "An ugly kissed me."

He doesn't notice the spy girls' smirks.

"We're glad your awake." Mandy says sympathetically. "You passed out on us."

Lou does remember not being well that morning.

"Just to ask." Nolan says. "Do you remember someone named Ox?"

He raises a brow. "No, should I?"

They shakes their heads, and Lou shrugs.

 _They are always weird_.

"Hey, Lou?" Nolan speaks. "Why don't we go and see the dolls? It is your **_purpose_** after all."

Lou feels something in his head click at that, it is his purpose. Nothing could get in the way of performing it.

Not even his loneliness or a certain green bunny dolls who's involvement in his life would be forgotten.

_"I love you, Lou." Ox says for the first time. "I love ya."_

_They kiss deeply, and Lou looks him in the eyes._

_"...._ ** _I love you to, Ox_** _._ "


	2. "Time jump."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> We've seen the beginning, now let's what had happened as time has passed for the two who were once 'brothers'.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey ya'll hope you enjoy the chapter! Update will be soon!

He feels his depression acting up again, it always can up at the worse times. It was a freaking burden.

_Ever since it happened._

The dolls sit down at their seats, and they do it characteristically slowly. It's like torture to him.

It has been around a year since Ox had gone out. His heart misses the doll daily, but his mind tells him that he has done the right thing.

It's a battle between the heart and mind.

His reputation is safe. He is safe. His position is safe.

_"Does reputation_ **_really_ ** _matter?"_

_He laughed and spoke in a sad tone. "Here it does. I can't change that, it's been this way since I came here."_

_Ox raised a brow. "You don't seem happy."_

_"Sometimes other emotions replace happiness. It doesn't last forever."_

The irony of his own statement. Lou sighs.

_I guess it really doesn't._

He wants to throw up, but he needs to teach these dolls on how to do the one thing that he wants to do.

His happiness had disappeared a long time ago. Nothing but his own darkness haunted him daily.

"So, dolls?" Being perfect takes time, he fakes a perfect smile. "You ready to learn?!"

They all cheer, and happiness shines in their eyes.

_"I am ready to learn!" Ox shouted for other dolls' misery. "Let's do this, Lou!"_

_He makes him laugh. "That's what I call optimism."_

_Ox just chuckles and ignores the other dolls glares. "I just really want this."_

_"I know, Ox." He puts his hand on his shoulder, and they meet eye to eye. "I know."_

_His feels his heart flutter, and the coldness in his chest fade a bit at the other's smile. He really did want to to go to the big world_.

He sighs again, the coldness has been building up for a while. He is heart has been frozen for a while, the warmth has been gone since his **_departure_**.

"So, you want to go?!" He exposes happily (in a fake way, he is _not_ happy, but **they** are happy). "Well, then? Let's get started."

His smile is fake, it stretches across his face unwillingly. He feels like a puppet on a string. His life is not his.

"But Lou?" A doll asks nervously. "Where's that rabbit UglyDoll that usually comes?"

He sighs again. "He is not coming here anymore, I have disposed of him. I realise that he hasn't got a chance. No point handing something as _precious_ as the big world to an ugly."

 _A lie._ A voice whispers. _You did the deed, you know where he is, where he should be, he isn't meant to be here._

The coldness spreads through his chest again, and he feels his souls freeze in the process. He doesn't care for anything.

"Yes!" A doll cheers. "They ugly isn't here anymore! Everyone repeat!"

They all chant it.

" _Ugly isn't here anymore! Ugly isn't here anymore! Ugly isn't h_ ** _ere anymore! Ugly isn't here anymore!_** "

They don't stop, even as he tries to stop them. He isn't controlling them, Lou can't control them. The chant is repeated constantly for a long time.

 ** _They don't seem to intend to stop_**.

 _"Ugly isn't here anymore! Ugly isn't h_ ** _ere anymore! Ugly isn't here anymore!_** "

How many times were they going to do this?

"Stop."

"Ugly isn't here anymore!"

"Stop!"

"Ugly isn't here anymore!"

Jesus Christ, they don't shut up.

 ** _"Ugly isn't here anymore!_** "

He can't handle it.

" ** _ENOUGH!_** "

The dolls freeze at his rage-filled shout, and he relishes in it. The power he has over his dolls. It feels good, intoxcating.

"You." He point at Alison, she started the chant. "Will go to the washer. You cannot disrupt class."

A bot comes at his command, and he watches apathetically as she is dragged away.

He smiles, and the sun shines in the sky as if it's a normal day. "Now, dolls. Now that the interruption has been removed, shall we carry on?"

He carries on as if he hasn't broken something important.

_"Lou?"_

_He turns around to see Ox, the bunny seems... fearful. Like he is afraid of him._

_He smiles gently, and bends down. "Yes, Ox? Is there something wrong?"_

_He feels something worry in his soul, the loneliness goes away a little._

_"Why did you put that doll in the washer?"_

_He shrugs apathetically. "It's apart of the rules, he needed to be put in. It's a rule that is out of my hands to change."_

_"Yeah, but.." Green eyes lock onto blue. "Can you just not act upon it?"_

_"Sorry, Oxie. I need to-"_

_"What if it was me?" He asked in a low tone. "Would you put me in?"_

_Lou freezes, and nods his head. "....Yes."_

_His eye widens in shock. "Why?"_

_"I...I can't help it, Ox." He shuts his eyes for a moment, then re-opens them. "I need to obey, the factory, t-they'll come for me if I don't."_

_He realises that he is nearly crying, the factory will easily scrap him if he fails to be perfect. It has already nearly happened once, it was a long time ago._

_Ox blinks in shock. "But your the only Prototype, Lou. They cannot replace you. You can bend the rules, just punish them by isolation from classes or something."_

_He smiles thinly. "I-I guess." He slides down the wall. "Thanks, Ox."_

_His closes his eyes, and then opens them to see the other on his lap. He is smiling. Lou does it back._

_"Promise me that you won't use the washer?"_

_He chuckles softly. "...I promise."_

**_It was one that was now broken_**.

He blinks as he continues to teach the class, his hands tightens into a fist for a second.

These....these dolls can have something he can't. They are allowed to be who they want to be. They csn laugh, dance, sing whenever they want to.

Not him, oh no. He is bounded by rukes by how he is has to act, look, and even breathe. His is not allowed to be himself.

"You need to look good." He can't help as he tidy some doll's hair, the mess bothers him. "If you don't, you won't be able to go the big world. You will be stuck here."

**_Just like me._ **

The thought is dark, and he doesn't block it out. He embraces it instead. The voice onky speaks the truth. His ugky truth.

He travels down the isle of desks as he continues to tslk. He says the ssme thing he has done to the last batch.

"You need to act like a doll."

**_Always be tidy and never make messes._ **

"You need to think like a doll."

**_Never think for yourself. Never seem to have a mind of your own._ **

"Never make your child aware."

 ** _They'll throw you out. They won't accept IMPERFECTIONS_**.

He smiles as the dolls look nervous and fearful. They should be, he understands better than _they_ think.

_"W-will we really be trashed?" Ox asks fearfully. "L-Lou! I don't want to be trashed!"_

_"Sometimes, life isn't fair." He replies coldly, but he smiles. "But if you work hard, you can achieve your dreams."_

_They are his house and in his living room watching tv. The channels are boring._

_"I-I won't?" Ox's nose touches his, and he doesn't know about personal space. "I really have a chance?!_

_He smiles more from the happy tone in his voice. "Yep. You just need to focus and train, then you have a chance."_

_"How come you don't go?"_

_Lou feels something gut-wrenching come into his chest, like a bullet piercing his skin. The tears perk up, and he smiles in a fake way again. "It's my job to help as leader. I'd leave if I could."_

**_You can never leave._ **

_He can't, he just lies about what he really is. It isn't against the rules to reveal what he truly is, but he just can't._

_"Oh!" Ox is truly naive to spot his lie, lucky for Lou that he is. "Ok! I just wanted to ask..."_

_Lou laughs genuinely at he look on his face, it Is a pouty one. "Aww, it's oksy, Oxie. I forgive you."_

_His tone is a purr, and he pulls the other closed. Ox is still new, but he is different. He doesn't know how, he just is._

**_But he can still go where you can't._ **

_His grip tightens a little on the other, he feels anger for a second, a dangerous emotion._

_Ox doesn't see it though, he is turned around to look at the tv. Lou smiles cruelly._

_The other has every right to be afraid. He doesn't really have a chance to be accepted anywhere_.

He laughs at the irony of the flashback. Lou feels himself feeling a good feeling as he hears Alison scream from the washer.

His laugh turns into a smile.

**_A special promise had been broken._ **

He csn akready feel his sanity diminish slowly. It's what happens to those who have mental problems, to those who have no one to understand. To thise who society had broken and beaten to create a new image for them.

His is a once happy, naive doll that has been turned into...this _perfectionist_. Some doll who he does not want to be. A role that he is forced to play.

A role that he hates with a passion.

"No kid likes messes." He arrives on stage with his hands folded behind his back. "I know that they don't. You know that they don't. So, what do we do?"

The same answer from the last batch arrives.

"Don't get messy!"

He pretends to grin proudly. "Good! Thst is very good. "

He lies to even himself, he doesn't feel anything. The words come out of him like mantra. They have been repeated before.

His mind is spacing out while his body is on autopilot. He checks his watch, he decides enough is enough.

"Lesson is over, training is tomorrow."

The dolls frown, but obey. They heed to his word. Lou knows best.

He is leader after all.

Nolan comes up to him. "That went well."

Their fingers intertwine, and Lou wants to pull away. He csn feel Michael glaring a mile away.

His eyes roll. "I know, I just taught them."

Nolan can be very irritating from time to time. Lou is sure that he doesn't meant ti be, but he is. He even makes himself uncomfortable, and they're supposed to be a bloody couple.

"So?" The spy girls come up. "What's today's plan? I just know we have something to do."

"The new batch are useless, they remind me of thst bunny doll that used to be here-" Tuesday realkzes that she has spoken too much as Kitty covers her mouth.

Lydia speaks then, her voice trembles a bit. "Ignore her, she is a dimwit. So, what is the plan?"

"Nothing." Lou shrugs. "I don't have anything in mind, I need to rest."

His body is still feeling not well. It needs to rest.

The memories are overwhelming him again. But he doesn't want to take the dosage. It temporarily makes him forget the memories, but not permanently.

And he does not wish for them to disappear either.

***

_ Build _

_ /b _ _ ɪ _ _ ld/ _

_ Verb _

_ 1\. make or become stronger or more intense. _

_2\. construct (something) by putting parts or material together_.

Ever since he left Perfection, Ox has been in the process of building a place for others. Where dolls like him are accepted.

He has been at hard work at this, dolls start to show up more and more. At first. he didn't really think that he needed to do this. But after that incident, he vowed to never let another doll to end up with the same fates as the others.

_He wonders about the pipes, he is confused._

_'Where am I supposed to go?'_

_It it easy to get lost in here. The pipea are dark, thry are dangerous. But he trusts Lou. He wouldn't lie to him._

_Right?_

_The doubt begins to seep in again, and Ox lets it for a second. It begins to be right, like Lou has lied to him, the one who he held compassion for lied to him._

_His chest feels hollow at the thought. The pipe seems a little more tighter. Ox hates his fear of being alone. It rules his life._

_He is glad that he has Lou. The one who has showed him the ropes of life. The one who had responded to his feelings._

**_The one who had become his lover_ ** _._

_Ox feels himself blush as she walks down the Pipes. Only the doll leader had the power to reduce him to that._

_The one who has the power to reduce him to a moaning mess whenever they had_ **_made love._ **

_This relationship had been...complicated to say the least. Especially with the rules of the factory. Very dysfunctional, but still workable._

"-OX!" A voice interrupts his thoughts. "Are you there?"

His eyes turn to scan the doll next to him, it is Moxy. The beauty who has somehow charmed all the uglydolls into liking her. Including Ox.

Oh, but not as a girlfriend. But as a best friend. They are nearly inseparable.

She was one of the first dolls to come to his little idea of this town. He worked very hard to build one thing after another.

One building has been the first, it was Moxy's home. Her house house stands on the middle of the town. It is there to symbolise the first of the accepting town before them.

"Yeah, I am." He rubs his neck, a nervous habit. "I just zoned out."

Her laugh is one that is adorable. Any doll will be lucky to have her when she surrenders her wild heart to them. But she won't for a long time, it isn't in her nature.

The sun shines in the sky, it is a bright day as the town of dolls wonders the streets. The population is already high, and it had only been a year since Ox decided to do this.

_"You really think I could do anything I wanted?"_

_Ox sits on Lou's lap as they sit in a private spot among the institute. The dolls are currently in their homes, the leader cancelled the lesson for that day._

_"Yep." He replies, laughing. The sound is like a instrument playing. Ox enjoys it tune. "I think you could, you have the spirit and heart for it. It isn't always about strength and looks."_

_Lou's eyes narrow as he say this, Ox notices that he does it a lot. It mainly happens when he talk about dreams or hopes. The other has a habit of avoiding these topics._

_"Why do you ask?"_

_Ox looks away shyly, a blush on his face. "Nothing, I was just curious."_

_It's not a lie, but it isn't the truth either. Ox hopes to go to the big world. He just doesn't tell the other, Lou has a face of anger whenever he expresses interest in leaving. He doesn't bring the topic up._

_"Why were you curious?" His tone is strange. "How did you have the idea the ask?"_

_"I just heard a couple of dolls talking about hopes of dreams, it wouldn't leave my mind."_

_His smile gets smaller. "Okay?"_

_"Thanks for that saying that earlier." Ox replies. "I just wanted to ask."_

_He nuzzles his nose against the other nervously. It's the first time that he has done it. Lou looks surprised, but allows it._

_It's his rabbit instinct to do that to its mate, and he is still technically the animal even if he is the doll version of it. It's in his nature._

_He sees Lou blush for the first time since they know each other. Ox smiles and laughs._

_"Yeah, I guess I can do anything."_  
  
A snapping makes him come out of it. It's the clicking of fingers. It's really annoying.

"What?" Ox snaps, but then he sees who it is. "Oh, hey, Luckybat."

It's his red bat friend, one of the first dolls who arrived. It goes Moxy, luckybat, Wage, Uglydog, then Babo.

He acts the most nervous since he is the youngest of the group. Babo maybe the... _biggest_ , but he doesn't act like he is older. He acts like a big world child.

Ox doesn't have much knowledge of them, but perfection provides information about them.

It's one of the reasons why he wanted to stay, he had wanted to learn about kids to see what his own might have been like.

The other is about a certain doll leader who had been the reason why he created this place in the first bit.

_The pipes seem to be getting darker. They are getting smaller. Just smaller._

_The claustrophobia is setting in, Ox hates tight spaces, hates spaces where they are empty and void of life. He hates it all._

_It's complete_ **_bullshit_ ** _his fear, he does know it. But it rules over his life. It controls what he does. The pipes are suffocating for him._

_Fear makes others cautious of the world around them, makes_ **_him_ ** _cautious of the world around him. It's both good and bad._

_"Ah!" He yells, a bright light makes its way into his eyes. "What the hell?"_

_The light is orange, like a fire (the irony). It's alluring, it shines likes a someone's temptation. It shines like a diamond._

_Ox walks towards it, the thing might be the sun to another place. He is_ **_wrong_ ** _._

_The sun is instead a fucking fire. It is a furnace. Doll parts float across some type of platform. They go right into it._

_'L-Lou sent me here?' The thought comes into his head. 'Was this the place all along?'_

_But something in him protests the thought. It can't believe that Lou would do this._

_It has to be a coincidence. Right?_

_It just has to be._

_The heat of the fire caresses Ox's fur as aftermath ashes go in him. It stings, and he is about a hundred feet from it. It shouldn't happen._

_The sight of alive dolls being burned alive go into his mind. Their_ **_screaming_ ** _will never be a sound that he will get rid of._

_"Help us!"_

_"Please!"_

_"_ **_WHAT DID WE EVER DO TO DESEVE THIS?!_ ** _"_

_That last sentence gets to Ox's brain. He freezes and a terrified expression appears on his face as he sees the doll being burned make the fear only boil more._

_But anger comes then. Anger at the factory for doing this, and anger at his now ex-lover for putting him in this situation._

_Ox didn't used to believe in fate, but now he does._

_"...A place where we can be accepted." He mumbles. "A place where all kinds of dolls don't die, they live."_

_It's just a random thing that comes into his head, but he knows that he has thought of it in the past. A idea that had come a long time ago._

_"I can do anything."_

_Ox gets some wood that he had spotted in the pipes and seals the entrance off. He starts to create his own._

_He starts to build the town known as_ **_Uglyville_ ** _._

Luckybat's hand in his snaps Ox out if it again. He looks at his lover. His blue eyes remind him of Lou's.

**(A/N: Luckybat has** **_blue_ ** **eyes in this.)**

The way they shined when he was happy, the way they developed tears when he was sad, the way that they flashed when he was angry.

 _Lou, Lou, Lou._ His thoughts repeat. _Lou, Lou, Lou._

The memories won't stop haunting him. They won't stop leaving him. Ox gets the urge to go back sometimes, but he has a _new_ ** _purpose_** now.

_"Everyone has a purpose." Lou laughs. "Even if at the start you don't, it just takes time to realise it."_

_"R-Really?" Ox had replied. "Then, what's mine?"_

_His face was held by Lou as he got closer. He smiled._

_"Yours is to be_ **_different_ ** _."_

Ox observes his new home around him, one that didn't torment him everyday of his life.

It was one that he had built on his own, a place that he was a **_leader_** in his own _right_.

"Hi, mayor Ox!" The dolls go past him go.

He laughs.

 _Not a leader._ He thought. _A mayor, no hierarchy here. Equality exists_.

His home was different to Lou. So, so fucking different.

He could give a thousand reasons why it was, but Ox is sure that everybody knows them.

Not that he would tell them his former involvement with the type 12 doll leader.

He feels a hand tighten around his, Luckybat looks at him with _those_ eyes. "You coming, Ox? Moxy and the gang wants us to hang out at hers."

He looks at the entrance to Uglyville for a second, the thing that had brought him here to start a new life. He is thankful for fate doing this to him.

His purpose is to help others now, this is where he belongs.

Lou wasn't **_his_** anymore, Ox knew that. His heart may **_not_** belong to Luckybat, but he did still care for him. That is more than enough to be with him.

Ox isn't ashamed to say that he is using him to.

_Maybe Lou moved on and is using someone to._

If only that could have been true. Ox knows that the leader is attractive, he can have any doll he wants. He would move on from him in heartbeat.

He feels said object protest in despair, but his mind knows it to be true.

"So, are you coming, Ox?!" Moxy asks excitedly. "We are going to the cafe! It has new kinds of sweets."

Her bouncy figure just seems more exciting. Ox laughs, he has nothing to do anyway. He might as well.

"Sure."

Moxy grabs his other hand and drags him along with Luckybat. They scream as she pulls them away.

He laughs at his current predicament, this is **_his_** present. Not perfection where he was with Lou. His mind forgets the the time as well.

Luckybat was here, Lou was there.

Uglyville is his home. Perfection is none existent.

His time is Lou is non-existent.

Or as _they_ say.

**_The past is the past._ **


	3. Just before.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ox sees his friends excitement. They want to go to the pipes. The place that leads to his past. But will he go?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey ya'll! hope ya enjoy this!
> 
> If ya have any ideas, please comment!
> 
> Don't forget to kudos and comment if ya like this!

_ Surprise _

_ /sə _ _ ˈ _ _ pr _ _ ʌɪ _ _ z/ _

_ 1\. (of something unexpected) cause (someone) to feel mild astonishment or shock. _

_2\. to strike or occur to with a sudden feeling of wonder or astonishment, as through unexpectedness_.

The thing that had been said to Ox was absolutely _surprising_. Those words that had been told to him had set off a feeling off both dread and nostalgia.

Dread because he doesn't want to go back there, the place that he had been tormented and bullied for years to an end. The place where the now ex-love of his life coukd be with another doll.

Nostalgia becuase a part of still wants to. To see the one who gave him a purpose. To see the one who he met all those yeare ago.

In a sick way, the leader of perfection helped him realize his purpose. If he had not sent Ox to his potential desty, he would never have found the furnace. Where those dolls were suffering.

_Their screams haint him daily. The desperation in their eyes. But t_ **_he screams, oh god, the screams. So loud, so loud, so DAMN LOUD-_ **

Luckybat kissing him snaps Ox out of it. Even when he is supposed to be loving him right now, his thoughts and heart always somehow direct to Lou in some kind of way. He doesn't know how, they just do.

It was sad, yet the hope filled him with giddiness. He was excited about seeing his ex more thsn being with his current boyfriend.

 _I truly am sick._ That thought repeats in his head. _I must be if I'm still_ ** _fucking_** _reminiscing today_.

Ha sighs and kisses back, but his thoughts have never once landed on the bat. He doesn't even haunt his dreams. Isn't that what someone you loved was supposed to do?

His eyes stare into the distance, the sun shines brightly in the town. There is always good weather here. No rain or storm ever enters here until everyone is miserable.

But no, they are happy. **_He_** is happy. At least, he is in the eyes of the _others_.

"Sorry, Moxy." His voice cracks just a little, but not enough to make her worried from her current excitement. "What did you say?"

"We found a way through the Pipe!" She squeals, her bouncing indicates it all. "We're gonna go today, Uglydog is getting the others as we speak. You wanna come with us?"

That question sends so many emotions through Ox, he lost count at thirteen.

Despair, happiness, anger, betrayal, hatred, **_love_** , etc.

His body feels like it is about to snap. Ox is not used to feeling these things at once. His mask is slipping, he can tell. He needs to be enthusiastic, he needs to be joyful.

 ** _He needs to be fake_**.

The sun shines just a little brighter, as if exhibiting his guilt.

 _Huh, Lou._ He thinks. _Looks like your not the only one who has to pretend._

He isn't lying.

_He walks over to his desk and looks at the leader in front of him. Ox feels excited for today's lesson. It was a couple of months before he would leave for the big world._

_Happiness seeps through him as the leader walks on stage. Ox still remembers how he held hand out when he first got here. It made him feel warm on his cheeks._

_Was Ox blushing?_

**_No, you can't have feelings for him. For God's sake, you only met him weeks ago_ ** _._

_But his beating heart states otherwise. It beats just a little faster._

_The leader smiles at him, Lou smiled at him, but it is a_ **_little off_ ** _. Like it isn't his own. "Meet our new doll. He just arrived with the new batch, his name is..."_

_He seemed to struggle, but his eyes spark._

_"-His name is_ **_Ox_ ** _."_

_His smile seems a bit true then._

_"So, we have a lesson?" Lou sounds like he doesn't know himself. "Huh, I wish I'd been told. Ahem, sorry, I just didn't expect the batch so soon. You all wish to go to the big world?"_

_His smile is so fake the even the dolls see it._

_"_ **_Let's get on with the lesson then._ ** _"_

The others stare at him with hope, he just can't crush it. They are his best friends after all. Especially Moxy, she is like a little sister to him.

He doesn't want to let them down, but his selfless side knows that he should stay here. That he shouldn't go back because he knows that he broke a promise that he made years ago.

The guilt haunts him daily and nightly. It seeps into his brain and makes his heart thump so fast that he thinks it's going to hurl out of him.

Ox knows he is a hypocrite. He doesn't need anybody to remind him that. The gaping hole in his chest is enough along with the memories that plague him in his sleep.

 ** _Am I really selfish enough to do this?_** _To go to the place where he is. The person who I used to and_ ** _still_** _love today_.

Ox doesn't know. His selfless and selfish side battles for dominance in his mind. They compete to win over his thoughts.

**_I might see him again._ **

_I broke the promise._

**_I might have a chance._ **

_I don't deserve it_.

They fight to win over him, each suggests different things. But you know what _they_ say.

_Ox walked over to the leader who seemed exhausted. Lou had just finished teaching a class and wanted to get rid of the dolls as soon as possible. He seemed to be in a depressed mood._

_"_ **_Sometimes, selfishness wins._ ** _" Lou spoke softly. "It's in a doll's nature to what something. You are justified."_

_Lou is sat down on a desk next to him, Ox approached him after class with a question. It had been surprising for him._

_Their eyes stare in silence. Lou secretly wishes for the doll to leave. But Ox sees the cigarette in his hand, he can't hide out forever._

_"You smoke?"_

_He smiles bitterly. "It helps with stress-"_

_Lou puffs a smoke out. It rises from his mouth and releases nicotine into his body. He feels relaxed. Ox can tell. But it's bad as well._

_"You ever think about quitting?" He asks with a brow. "Your selfish side is showing."_

_He chuckles, and his smile is not his fake one for once. "You don't know my selfish side."_

**_It's a broken smile_ ** _._

_One from a doll who had been forced to be what society wanted. Be some doll who he wasn't. Ox sees the desperate cry for help underneath the_ **_perfection_ ** _._

_"You wanna be friends?" He asked. "This is my selfless side."_

_The cigarette is dropped in shock and desperation. Shock because of the question. Desperation from wanting to answer it._

_He is determined not to let his role ruin this. "Yeah, I guess." The reply is casual. "I don't mind. But training is tomorrow, get some rest."_

_"Okay."_

_Ox knows the blonde is pushing him away. His selfless side wants to keep him from the demons inside of his mind. But his selfish one wants to tell it._

_To let the bunny know his pain._

_But Lou doesn't do that. Instead, he shrugs. "Go now."_

_His selfless side wins, and Ox's selfish one leaves._

_Two different ones were present then. The selfish and the selfless_.

_The damage that the sides had done was unforgivable. So, so much_ **_fucking_ ** _damage._

Ox still remembers the incident. The day that all things had gone to hell.

His friends bring him to reality, they are practically begging for him to say the word that would decide his fate. He wants to say it.

But the answer would make him see him again. The one who he both loved and hated in equal measured.

He has a feeling that the leader feels the same about him.

The sky is so clear that Ox's vision blues for a second, he feel like fainting due to the heat. The sun is there to make sure their bodies are warm for the day.

It feels like it is sent there to mess with his mind.

But his answer come out of his mouth without his permission, like a spirit has taken over his body and is forcing his actions.

He obligation and promise to make the dolls happy rules him. It possesses him, it takes over him.

He looked Moxy and the others in the eyes, he feels Luckybat squeeze his hand. It's like he knows about his fears and anxiety.

He knows that he will regret this.

" ** _....Yes_**."

***

_ Fill _

_ /f _ _ ɪ _ _ l/ _

_ Verb _

_ 1\. hold and perform the expected duties of (a post or role). _

_2\. satisfy or fulfil (a want or need)_.

The morning sun shines through the window, but two dolls don't pay attention. Lou is trying to _fill_ the empty void in that bothers him on daily basis.

He pins Nolan to the wall of his room, their mouths connect in a kiss that is suppose to make a doll feel _loved_ , _needed_ , **_cared for_** **.**

Lou feels none of those as the lips battle for dominance. His win of course, he is the leader, he is not the submissive follower. He sometimes wished he was.

Everyone expects him to know everything about perfection and how it is to be perfect. He, himself, is not perfect though, he feels like an ugly.

Not on the inside, but on the in. He fakes his smiles, fakes his actions, expressions, words. Lou has to hold back what he wants to say.

 ** _Those dolls will never probably get through._** A voice whispers on his head, it feels like it breathes in his ear. He finds it disturbing. **_Not like you can, either_**.

He tries to shush the voice in head as Nolan suddenly pins him to the wall. They fight for dominance like ferals. Lucky for Lou that he likes it rough.

Their lips clash in a bruising kiss, their clothes are long forgotten. Lou still has his pants on though, he wasn't needy. Not like whiny, little horny Nolan.

"Slut." He purrs, he likes causing others pain. "You like that, don't you?"

He likes to take his pain on others, it makes him feel a little better for his actions and feelings on a basis of day to night of darkness in his mind.

It takes over at moments like these, takes over his mind. Makes him less sane. He craves that loss of control, Lou wants to be the one to learn.

Ironic, he knows. But he can't help what his desires want. It just comes in instinct.

His arms being the other closer and he wraps his legs around Nolan's waist. The other seems to like this as he allows it to happen.

Lou is desperate for this void to be filled, it consumes both his mind and soul. It drains him daily.

But this, oh God, he craves this. Not being alone, being with someone. Even if it only calms the void temporarily, it still puts it to rest. His mind registers that he isn't alone for once. It is enough for it then.

Arms wrap around him, and he is slammed into the wall. Lou's mind is blank of all thought. He can only focus on the lust consuming it while Nolan knees his area.

" _Ahh~_ " He moans quietly. " _Mmm~_ "

Nolan knows what he wants and how to get it. He doesn't care that it's morning for once, Lou feels the void fade away and lust fill his body.

His mind blurs from the pleasure he is receiving. Nolan knows how to go rough and gentle with him.

His back hits the bed as he continues to speed up. His pants had come off somehow a long time ago.

The sun goes into his eyes as if protesting his actions. Like he is committing a sin and he needs to stop before he would be in hell.

 _Heaven and hell can fuck off._ He can barely make the thought as he screams in pleasure. _This is mine._

It's something that Lou personally owns. He own the time he has to receive the temporary companionship he craves.

 ** _His life isn't his, his identity isn't his, not even his own mind is his_**.

Nothing belongs to him except this. His addiction.

Nolan kisses his neck and nuzzles it in a certain spot that makes Lou see stars, the male doesn't speak. Lou doesn't want him to.

_"No talking or romanticism."_

Those are his rules. Easy to follow in his opinion. Nolan wants to be with him, he has to do that. All he has to is be quiet in sex, and not to be romantic in public.

 _Easy_. Lou thinks. _Only those who aren't worthy don't do it._

He knows that he is harsh, but he doesn't care. This is his time to be normal. His body does what he desires, not the factory's.

Lou feels like they will find out about his absences and late marks to lessons, but he can't give a crap. The time he has right now is too much for his mind to consider two things at once. Reality is thrown out the window, his self-control is lost.

He briefly imagines that he is on top doing the deed, but it is Ox under him like those years ago. He will never forget the pleasure that only he could provide for him.

_He stared at the green bunny with love as the other screamed in pleasure. Lou knows that it isn't out of pain though._

_"Are you okay?" He asks gently and slows. "I can stop if you want?"_

_Just becuase he goes rough on the bunny doesn't mean he was an animal. He was the leader of perfection after all._

_"N-No." Ox pants and Lou moans when his pelvis clutches tighter. "I just lost my self control, I guess."_

_His screams in the pillow indicate thst. It is night as they do this. Lou is supposed to be giving him 'extra lessons'. He kinda was in a way, but it had somehow ended up to this. He doesn't even know how._

_They're on the couch in his living room, there are windows that aren't curtained. It means that dolls could see them in this position._

_For some reason, Ox has a kink for it. Lou doesn't even question why._

_His control is being lost as the other looks so_ **_fucking_ ** _desirable under him. Beneath him. The one who he commands. The one who wants him._

_His heart beats a little faster and it feels alive at this moment. The bunny had somehow captured his attention and heart at the same heart. He feels grateful that fate allowed him this._

_But it has to stay secret, the consequences are too dire if he gets caught. It would be worse for the bunny as well. Lou would probably be let off with a warning, but Ox would be recycled._

_He had only barely managed to convince the factory to allow an ugly to stay. He was on thin ice at this very moment._

_Being kissed by the bunny makes the thought go. He had turned around and pulled him in. Lou is pulled down and they switch positions. He is under Ox now._

_This just felt right._

_Their lips connedy in one of their first kisses. It's desperate and sloppy. They both don't have much experience._

_Ox grinds him and Lou feels himself groan. His hips lift._

_The bunny grins in a feral way. "You ready to be pleasured,_ **_MY Leader?_ ** _"_

_He smiles and his eyes are filled with lust. "..._ **_Yes_ ** _."_

_Ox pleasures him until they pass out from it. Lou loves it_.

His mind is pulled out of it as Nolan hits his senstive bit. Lou can't help but scream the name out ss he does this. He screams out the **_wrong_** name.

" ** _OX!_** " He cries and he feels happiness for a moment. " ** _O-Ox..._** "

He is too lost in the bliss to notice the error he made. His mind doesn't register it for a few moments until he notices Nolan's horrified expression.

They stare in silence until Lou notices something on his desk stand.

He talks then, and commands. " ** _Do it._** "

The medicine is put into him in a second. His feels his memories slowly being repressed until the bunny is just a distant thought at the back of his mind.

His eyes open when the pain goes.

_When the hell did I close them?_

He grabs his head and moans in pain. He turns on his back slightly.

Nolan grabs him and helps him up. "Hey, it's ok."

Lou is a bit limp in his grip. He allows the affection as his mind tries to register what is going on around him.

He coughs a little and he clings onto Nolan for support. He feels the other's breath hitch. Lou isn't usually as weak as this.

_We did just make love._

That was a good explanation.

Lou gets his suit on and is eventually able to go without any support. He feels himself grab Nolan's hand.

_An obligation to their relationship._

He really fucking hates it.

Lou feel the urge to grab the cigarette. Yep, he hasn't given up the best habit. He relapsed after the bunny left.

There is an unusual hatred as he thinks of him.

He doesn't realise that his memories might come back later.

"Let's go, we have dolls to teach."

The other looks him in the eyes.

Lou is filling his purpose now, and his sadistic smile to punish dolls suddenly appear.

He doesn't realise the trouble that will appear soon.

 ** _He doesn't know much the past will come back to haunt him_** ** _on today of all days_**.


	4. Present time.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ox arrives at perfection, Let's see what happens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey ya'll! Hope ya enjoy this!
> 
> Comment and kudos if you like this!
> 
> IF YOU HAVE ANY SUGGESTIONS FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER, JUST COMMENT!

_ Arrive _

_ /ə _ _ ˈ _ _ r _ _ ʌɪ _ _ v/ _

_ Verb _

_ 1\. reach a place at the end of a journey or a stage in a journey. _

_2\. to come to a certain point in the course of travel; reach one's destination_.

Ox and the others gasp as they have air again. It felt like it had been sucked when they had gone through the pipe hole flower, but they had done it. They had _arrived_ at the place where he dreaded the most.

 _God_. He thought as they stepped out. _It's been this long._

It feels foreign to step into the ground that he had once been on. The ground that he has not been once now, but twice.

Once upon a time, Ox had the worries about being here. His fear still ruled as he stared at the other dolls passing through the crowd.

It reminds Ox of when he had found himself not dead. He was pleasantly surprised when the factory had allowed him to live.

But it was all thanks to the leader that rescued him.

_Ox feels Lou carrying him away from the other dolls as the lesson had gone horribly. Their...this thing that they have had nearly been exposed._

_"-Lou?" Ox groans. "I'm sorry."_

_The green being trembles as he begins to sob, it was his fault that it happened. The incident._

_"Heh, little bunny." Lou smiles warmly at him. "It's okay, it wasn't your fault."_

_The moon shines in the sky as the stars twinkle. The only light source available. Ox barley sees anything in the dark._

_But he's glad that the shadows can cloak them. It hides the ones who have considered doing a 'sin'._

_But it isn't to them, the thing that they hold for each other is special._

_The leader is too good for him, too forgiving. Ox started an argument with another doll after he called him 'weak'._

_Something had triggered inside and he only remembered attacking him. Like something else had taken control._

_Ox's chest swells with guilt as he leans on Lou's shoulder. His head rests on the crook of it._

_Perfection is just..._ **_perfection_ ** _at night. There is no one there to catch it disturb them._

_Lou sighs. "Your lucky I could get Carson punished in the washer. The factory isn't going to like this._ **_Your going to seem like the bad guy_ ** _."_

_The phrase spikes something in Ox as they arrive at their destination. Lou's mansion._

_The gauntlet is right next to it. Ox eyes it for a moment before turning to the leader._

_"I know." Lou puts him down on the couch. "I just...snapped for some reason."_

_"I don't blame you." The leader replied and puts a bandage on the bunny's arm. There is a near broken bone there. "To be honest, I laughed my head off. I hate this batch anyway. Except you."_

_Ox feels a blush come on his face and turns it away. The leader has that affect on him._

_He scratches his arm as it itches, Lou grabs his hand. "Don't, you'll only make it worse."_

_The leader looks at him with a mixture of emotions. Anger, worry, happiness, a hint of_ **_love_ ** _._

**_Fuck_ ** _, he wants to spend the night again. To be in the leader's arms and maybe have some_ **_fun_ ** _._

_"I know you worry." Ox whispers, and climbs onto Lou's lap. "It's cute in a way that you rescued me. I am grateful...can I spend the night again?"_

_"Ox." He hisses. "You know you can't, it's too risky."_

_The leader doesn't push him off though, he seems to want the same. Like his body and mind were clashing._

_He sighs. "Please, leader. I...I can't be alone again."_

_Ox's selfish side comes to play. The curtains are open, but he grabs the leader's face to meet his._

_Their only inches of each other. Their lips can just connect._

_Lou gives into temptation as his body wants this, his mind protests, but he doesn't care._

_Their lips clash, and Ox knows he has won. The factory has no power over them here._

_He had the leader under his command now._

_Ox smiles as they part. He smirks. "Thank you."_

_Lou stares at him, but Ox can see the message in his eyes._

**_Thank you for staying._ **

The sound of the machines bring him out of it. The whirling and crashing of it makes him nervous.

_I don't like this._

The memories of the place make Ox's fear try to come to fear again, but the green bunny remains in place.

He can't let it fool him anymore. The fear can't possess him.

"Ox?" Luckybat looks at him with those damn blue eyes. "Are you alright?"

God, why does Luckybat have to be so damn irritating? Ox knows that he cares, but still...

"Yes." He answers with a thin smile. "Yes, I am."

It's instinctual you say that. A phrase invented by time.

Nobody can know how he really feels inside.

Deep down, Ox is broken and messed up.

" _Welcome, everyone!_ " A speaker shouts. It is so loud. " _To the institute of perfection, everyone of you will be dolled up into the correct category!_ "

 _They still use that?_ Ox rolls his eyes as they walk. _Seriously, they couldn't change it at_ ** _least_** _for once._

The factory has either fallen downhill since he left or Ox's memory is just bad.

He goes for the first. It is always the first.

God, that voice irritates him though.

"Please continue walking." It spoke again. "Don't touch anything, we don't want to be imperfect, do we?"

"Wow, Moxy." Uglydog clicks his tongue. "You were about this place."

Oh, naive Uglydog. Ox thinks. You don't know the true darkness that haunts this place.

The dolls see one of the other ones walk into a platform.

" _Your name is Meghan._ " It spoke as it scanned her. " _You are a lawyer...slash model_."

She laughs as she finished changing. "Objection your honour!" She stepped off the platform.

Ox wants to be sick.

" _You name is Michael._ " The machine spoke again. " _Your a engineer...slash model._ "

He whooped. "I'm an individual, like the rest of you!"

Ox gags in disgust. God, he doesn't miss that bit of the dolls coming out. It got old quick.

But Moxy, innocent little Moxy steps on the platform before Ox can stop her.

Her arms went out. "I'm really doing it!"

But the scanners, they malfunction.

Ox facepalms himself. He knows what is about to happen.

_This is what happened when I got here._

" _Not...able to process, not pretty._ " The scanners began to shake. " ** _Not pretty, can'tprocess, not pretty, can'tprocess!-_** "

It explodes and Ox jumps back. He is actually surprised when it does.

He laughs a bit. He finds it appropriate here.

 _Take that_.

Ox never liked that thing anyway. It was always a judgy thing.

They officially step into perfection and they are all drawn over to Moxy when she stares at a screen.

"Guys." She whispers like she is so, so happy right now. "We're here, no one can stop us now."

 _She's right_. Ox thinks. _Nothing can stop us._

He pauses for a moment.

 ** _Except for the leader that haunts my thoughts day and night_**.

But his eyes are drawn to the screen, Ox feels like he is hypnotised by the glow and image in it.

The child is spinning around with a perfect doll in her arm and looks so damn happy.

Ox briefly imagines himself in its place.

_"Lou?" Ox says as they lay in his bed. "Do you think I could ever to to the big world?"_

_It is night as they are supposed to be asleep, but the nightmares haunt Ox's mind like a disease._

_His body feel infected with it. Fear, plain fear. The covers over his chest don't even help to keep the cold._

_His mind doesn't want him to have the nightmares again, to experience the trauma._

_"Hmm?" Lou buries his head into the other's neck, Ox's arms are around him. "Yes, I think you could."_

_"But why?"_

_The darkness in the room illuminates their faces, they can barely see each other. But they know that the other doll is there._

**_They just do_ ** _._

_"Because you can." Lou replied, his hands stroking the bunny's ears. "I know you can, you can do anything. Just believe in yourself."_

_His eyes show sincerity in them. Ox smiles and snuggles more into the other._

_"Thank you, my leader." He says. "What would I do without you?"_

_Lou is silent. "No, Ox. I would be lost without you. Your the light to my darkness. My draining, life sucking darkness."_

_Ox only laughs like it is a joke. "I know that, I feel the same when your with me."_

_Lou tightens his grip possessively as his eyes shut. Ox does the same as the moon shines in through the curtain less window._

_It's one of the best sleeps the two dolls have_.

Ox blinks as reality returns, the memory came for no reason.

He sighs. "What the hell was that?"

But then he hears the whispers.

_"Is that?"_

_"No, it can't be."_

_"Lou is going to be_ **_pissed_ ** _."_

_"What is Ox doing back?"_

Luckily the others don't here them, Ox does because of his extra hearing.

He glares at the dolls in anger, he hates them with a really big passion.

They glare back, specifically the spy girls known as Kitty, Lydia, and Tuesday. Nolan is also there.

Ox had only known him for a couple of days before he left.

But then the four smirk. Three of them say that infamous phrase.

" ** _Look, listen, learn._** "

The lights suddenly go and Ox knows what is going to happen.

The leader was going to come out.

***

_ Ready _

_ / _ _ ˈ _ _ r _ _ ɛ _ _ di/ _

_ Adjective _

_ 1\. in a suitable state for an action or situation; fully prepared _

_2\. easily available or obtained; within reach_.

Lou puts on his usual suit as the he sorts the buttons out. He is fidgeting, but getting _ready_ to see the batch of dolls for lesson today.

 _Even though there is no actual lesson, that is tomorrow's problem_. The thought occurs. _Or that is_ ** _my_** _problem._

He sighs and stares out the window of his own home. Sometimes he wants to isolate himself here, be trapped with himself and the thoughts.

The cruel, testing thoughts. God, they linger nearly everyday, they taunt him every chance they get.

 _Ox left for a reason._ One speaks. _That's why your alone._

Lou knows this to be true, he is the reason Ox left in the first place. Why the thing that they shared died all those years ago. Why he didn't get a chance to **_fucking_** protest.

_Your an idiot. You should have stood up for him._

He knows this as well, they had been in a relationship. Weren't they supposed to stand up for one another?

_No wonder dolls only date you for your status. You don't even have the capability to_ **_love_ ** _._

It died years ago when the bunny left, like the light in Lou had just gone. Like the inner fire had just extinguished completely.

**_No wonder Nolan dates you, the self-pity is just sad. He only pities you, pities the monster inside of you._ **

Lou closes his eyes and lets out a shaky breath. He can hear the lights go off outside. He's supposed to be there right now.

But his body doesn't move, the sun shines through the windows as if protesting against his action.

He sighs a little as he leans on the wood of the window for support.

**_Ox will never lie you again, you casted him aside like he was nothing and for what?_ **

Lou's breath hitches and he knows what is coming.

 _Please_. He begs. _Don't say it, don't say-_

**_-To protect your reputation. To protect your status as the perfect leader when your just a sorry little..._ **

It waits a while before saying it. Lou's body is frozen in agony. His hands clutch the floor, his breaths are shaky.

 ** _...Prototype_**.

It has said it, Lou's ugly truth. The thing he hides from the others. Not even Ox knows the secret that Lou refuses to tell.

 ** _It's not like he's here._** A sinister voice whispers. **_He broke the little promise he made all those years ago. To visit._**

 _He abandoned me._ He thinks. _He promised._

The darkness inside Lou purrs at the thought. Like he is only supposed to think in a negative way. He isn't allowed to be happy.

**_It died and withered the day that his trust did._ **

Lou lets no one in, not even Nolan.

He suddenly his hand being grabbed by the mentioned doll. How did he get here so fast?

The smile there is so sickly innocent, like Nolan can do no wrong, like he had done something or refuses to share a secret that Lou fully well deserved to know.

"Yes?" He asks emptily. "Is there something you need?"

"Just wanted to wish you luck?" Nolan bits into Lou's neck, his teeth drag down the base to the hickey that had been placed there last night. "Is that so wrong?"

He shakes his head. "No, I was just curious."

He isn't lying, Lou actually is. Nolan usually doesn't show up when he is about tot greet the dolls.

_Something is going on._

But the thought disappears as Nolan kisses his neck and places love bites there. But he holds Lou possessively, like he needs to show that the doll leader is his property.

_Why?_

The thought disappears their lips connect in a passionate kiss. Nolan grabs onto Lou's neck he does.

The leader is taken aback, why was he doing this now?

_Respond to show your normal._

He listens to the voice and grabs Nolan's waist. His hands wonder and stroke the dolls side as they do this.

But his mind imagines the another doll in his place.

_The night seemed to shine as two dolls laugh like maniacs. They both hide behind a tree as a bot was chasing them._

_It was a game of hide and seek._

_Lou laughs like there is no tomorrow, fear pounds in his heart, but the excitement and rush is still there._

_"Damn, Ox!" He looks at the giggling bunny. "I didn't know you had that in you!"_

_The green doll just smirks. "I told you before that I was going to get my revenge! I know there was something in that food!"_

_They sit on the cold, hard stoned floor as they catch their breath. Carson had his hair dyed to a green colour._

_Lou was going to throw him in the washer tomorrow for being ugly. He doesn't tell Ox that._

_"Still." He covers his mouth. "It feels great to loosen up."_   
_he_   
_He leans back into the tree as they hear the robot nearby. Ox sits on his lap and looks out the front of the tree, it passes without even looking at them._

_He looks back at the leader._

_Lou has only a white shirt on and black pants with his usual shoes. The suit has gone. Ox suggested it._

**_His_ ** _leader suits the look._

_His hair is messed up into a not so tidy style due to running and sweat. They ran pretty far._

_Lou looks at the sky and notices just where they are._

_The area is grassy once you step on it, the trees hide the the spot as it has an open space. The stars have a perfect view here, and there is a bench just a few feet away._

_He smiles, no one else knows of this place. The bots knew everywhere here._

_"Ox." He smiles. "This is out of character for new, but don't tell anyone about this. It can be our escape."_

_The bunny smiles that adorable smile. He realises what Lou does. "I get it~"_

_He chuckled and the bunny suddenly captures his lips. Lou oofs and puts his hands around Ox's waist. The bunny had sits on his lap and has his around his neck._

**_It feels so damn right._ **

Lou opens his eyes and sighs. He didn't know how long had passed, but he knows that Nolan is still kissing him.

His body has pinned him to the wall, and they someone have ended up making out in his house.

But as Nolan mixes his tongue with his, the method feels too familiar to the bunny's.

"Ox~" He moans. "Little bunny~"

He feels Nolan freeze and so does Lou. Their lips are still together and he feels fear.

_Is he going to tell the factory?_

Lou had been punished just days ago for thinking about the bunny. He nearly lost his leadership.

"Nolan." He told him. "I'm sorry."

Lou feels vulnerable and the doll grabs his waist. He places a kiss on his forehead. His body calms down.

"Shh." Nolan soothes. "It's fine. I know the memory was triggered."

Lou leans into the touch, he craves physical contact. He is ashamed of this.

"Did you take it?"

Lou looks at the tablet in his hand. He swallows it.

Nolan grins as the other's eyes haze a bit. The memories were being suppressed.

"Heh." He grins. "Are we going out or what?"

Nolan stand as they go out the door. He takes a detour to go to the spy girls.

He made sure Lou wouldn't go near Ox.

But he doesn't know if he was successful or not.

***

_ Stage _

_ /ste _ _ ɪ _ _ d _ _ ʒ _ _ / _

_ Noun _

_ 1\. a point, period, or step in a process or development. _

_2\. a raised floor or platform, typically in a theatre, on which actors, entertainers, or speakers perform_.

As Lou went onto the _stage_ , he looks at the dolls.

They admire him, look up to him, follow him.

He has power here. The dolls obey to his will.

After all, he is the first ever one. He has more knowledge than them.

But in the darkness, he sees something else. A pair of lock onto his.

Well, one eye and a cross. But no, it cannot be.

 _It is him._ His fists clench. _Why is he here?_

There are so many emotions.

Anger, recognition, hatred, conflict, happiness, love.

Oh dear lord. Lou grins and chuckles. I know what to do.

It's the one thing Lou does best.

 ** _Destroy hopes and dreams_**.

He was going to sing a song to insult the dolls.

**_But now I am going to sing a song to humiliate you._ **

Dolls cheer his name, specifically Tuesday.

But he swears, oh, he swears that one of them was from Ox.

The green hared **_bastard_**.

He closes his eyes and a song comes to mind. It's the perfect one.

**_I am a monster, and so are you._ **

His lips part to form the melody.

_"Let me introduce myself_   
_You didnt think i was done_   
_Did ya?_   
_Well i just began having my fun_   
_Baby"_

He starts to walk down the stairs as dolls stare at him, the song is unexpected. But then they start to cheer.

Lou grins as he reaches the middle.

_Mindless idiots._

All of them are.

_"Some people live for attention,_   
_Playing the victim_   
_But baby i was born to do the_   
_Killing"_

He starts to do a little dance to go with the beat, the song is different to what everyone expects.

His grin doesn't disappear as he reaches the bottom.

He boops a dolls nose as he sings the last bit.

_"I see how your going crazy,_   
_Always thinking bout me_   
_Baby on the daily_   
_Feed me your negativity_   
_Talk some more about me_   
_I know that you love me_   
_Love me!"_

He jumps as she reaches the beginning of the stairs. Lou lets out a laugh at the bang.

Nolan stares at him in worry. But Lou doesn't pay him any attention.

Dolls start to murmur, but they carry on cheering.

They always did. Lou smiles as he pulls Nolan up.

"They green doll is here."

Now Nolan knows what he had planned.

_"Funny how you think im bothered,_   
_Know im nothing like the others_   
_You shouldnt have messed with me_   
_Cause_   
_I heard_   
**_That your afraid of monsters_ **   
**_MONSTERS!"_ **

Lou looks at Ox angrily as he has blended into the audience seamlessly. Surprising since he had so many flaws.

His face is one of fear and the other dolls start to look at him.

Lou smiles sadistically. Nolan grips his hand, he oddly doesn't mind it this time.

_"Are you ready for the_   
_Monster?_   
_MONSTER?!_   
_Are you ready for the_   
_Monster?_   
_MONSTER!?!?_   
_Are you ready for the_   
_Monster_   
_MONSTER!?!?_   
_You ain't ready for the_   
_Monster!_   
_MONSTER!!!"_

Lou lets out a maniacal laugh as the bunny starts being stared upon. He feels satisfaction.

 _So, old friend._ Lou looks at him. _You really returned._

The dolls look at Ox is disgust. Lou knows how to get revenge, this is just a mild one.

Nolan squeezes his hand tighter, Lou's demons had come out to play. He is worried.

Lou smiles reassuringly and presses a kiss to the doll's head. The doll gasp, the rumours were true.

He turns to them. "Nolan is **_mine_**."

 _I'm just being me,_  
 _Cut out the things that I don't need,_  
 _And I dont care if you disagree,_  
 _I don't need no sympathy!!_  
 _Winning the game on my own_ ,"

Ox notices how Lou was looking at the male doll with love, and how he looks at home with rage.

 ** _Hatred_**.

He feels his chest constrict.

_"Yeah baby,_   
_I see how your going crazy,_   
_Always thinking bout me_   
_Baby on the daily_   
_Feed me your negativity_   
_Talk some more about me_   
_I know that you love me,_   
_LOVE ME!!"_

Ox gasps as Lou bends down to his level, their eyes meet. Blue go to one green.

" ** _You shouldn't have come back._** "

Ox gasps at how his breath was in his ear. What was Lou doing?

_"Know I'm nothing like the others,_   
_You shouldn't have messed with me_   
_Cause_   
_I heard_   
_That you're afraid of_   
_Monsters?_   
_MONSTERS!!!"_

Lou wonder away from Ox and goes to recieve praise from other dolls.

They provide it to him.

Moxy turns to him. "Ox, what is going on?"

He didn't answer, he didn't know himself.

But he does know what Lou intends to do.

_"Are you ready for the_   
_Monster?_   
_MONSTER!?!?_   
_Are you ready for the_   
_Monster?_   
_MONSTER!?!_   
_Are you ready for the_   
_Monster?_   
_MONSTER!?!?_   
_You ain't ready for the_   
_Monster?_   
_MONSTER!!!"_

He grins as the dolls start chanting with him. The back up singers take care of that verse.

The stage provides the doll leader with the chance to do a little dance, but then he stops and looks at Nolan.

He kisses him in front of Ox.

It shows that he had moved on from the monster of a doll there.

_"Ah, it could've been so different between us,_   
_But then you went and messed everything up!_   
_You took a knife and stabbed me in the back_   
_Took everything I had_   
_Went to your friends and laughed!"_

Ox suddenly felt himself being pushed into the stage as Lou sang this.

He could feel the pain from the song, like there was a message that he couldn't understand.

He swear that he saw a tear in the dolls leader's face.

_"This is the last time,_   
_Imma gonna tell you now_   
_If you try to break me,_   
_I'm gonna burn you down!_   
**_Baby im done with you,_ **   
**_Not coming back for you_ **   
**_(You)"_ **

There was a mixture of boos and cheers. Boos for fox, cheers for Lou.

He grins as the bunny's ears go down.

_He isn't feeling the same hollow feeling I do everyday of my life._

It feels good breaking the other, having the bunny just being there and taking the abuse.

Once upon a time, Lou would have protected him. But now..

 ** _He was the one who is in control_**.

_"(Let me introduce myself)_   
_Its funny how you think im bothered,_   
_Know I'm nothing like the others,_   
_You shouldn't have messed with me cause_   
_I heard_   
**_That you're afraid of_ **   
**_Monsters?_ **   
**_MONSTERS!!"_ **

He bends down the the dolls level to let him know just who this song was for.

"So, little bunny." He mocks him. The sun shines a little darker. "I hate you, don't expect a happy ending."

"I don't."

He stands up and back away, the doll had gotten the message.

_"Are you ready for the_   
_Monster?_   
_MONSTER!?!?_   
_Are you ready for the_   
_Monster?_   
_MONSTER!?!?!_   
_Are you ready for the_   
_Monster?_   
_MONSTER!?!?!_   
**_You ain't ready for the_ **   
**_Monster!_ **   
**_MONSTER!!"_ **

Lou smiles as the song finishes. Doll cheer him as he stares at the green doll, but Ox just closes his eyes.

Pretty dolls boo him everywhere. And then Lou notices something.

_More of his kind._

There is a pink, blue, orange, grey and red dolls standing there.

But they are the other kind.

 ** _Uglydolls_**.

Lou bends down to their level. Though the grey one is admittedly tall.

"I don't know where you belong." He talk to the pink one. "But it isn't here. Who are you?"

"Their names." Ox hisses, and Lou has to stop himself flinching from the hateful tone. "Are Moxy, Wage, Babo, Uglydog and Luckybat. He's my boyfriend."

Time freezes for Lou, this new information is surprising.

He stand up and puts on a fake smile.

_Why does it hurt so much?_

He should be over the green bunny, but something in his mind says one thing.

**_Ox is mine._ **

The possessive thought hurts so much.

"I'm Lou." He says. "And this is Nolan, my boyfriend as well. Coincidence, isn't it?"

His head tilts with a smile. Nolan just looks confused.

"But still." Lou smiles. "It's best if you leave, you don't belong here. Your just uglydolls."

They seem discouraged then and turned to leave but a voice says. "No."

Lou feels himself and the others gasp. "What do you mean?"

Ox talks again with a smirk. He is challenging Lou. "I'm saying that we can be here."

Moxy smiles at her friends encouragement. "Yeah, we've come this far. We are gonna train here and be as lovable as the rest of you."

Lou just looks at them, but then he laughs. The laughter is infectious as other dolls do it to.

He finds it hilarious they they believed it.

**_But my secret. The fact that that I'm as ugly as them on the inside means I can't as well._ **

What are the other chances that they could as well?

"Only pretty dolls can do the gauntlet." He smirks and approaches the pink doll, Moxy. "Rules are rules."

"What rules?"

He struggles with the words for a moment until a bot appears. "Did someone says rules? Well, it says right here in section 20-"

Lou quickly jumps on the book.

_Why do we even have that thing?!_

But he clears his throat. "You know what, stay here."

"Really?"

Ox was shocked, did Lou just say that?

"Yeah, what kind of benevolent leader would I be if I didn't other dolls a chance?" He asked rhetorically. "Mandy, shows them to their quarters. May I suggest the...supply suite?"

Ox rolled his eye.

_He means shed._

As the other dolls started walking, Lou beckoned Moxy and him over.

"I have a reputation to maintain, so I let you both skip by this time." He hissed. "Enjoy this moment while it lasts, **_because it doesn't get better than this._** "

Moxy slowly nodded and went off, but Lou grabbed Ox's wrist.

"Your staying with me."

_Apart of me wants you to myself,_ **_even if it is just for a little bit._ **

He stared. "W-What?"

_Did he just say that?_

Moxy and the others froze as well.

"Lou." Nolan spoke. "Why are you?-"

"Hush, Nolan." He hissed. " ** _Not now._** "

Ox noticed the coldness in Lou's eyes and the cruelty of his tone. Nolan bowed his head.

"It only makes sense." Lou laughed. "Two leaders discussing what they can do for their dolls. What about it, Ox?"

The green bunny looks at the others, his friends, the ones who he has knows since forever.

They need him, they want him.

But then he looks at Lou, the one who he had been with in the past. The one who he felt actual love for.

He sees something else in those blue eyes.

 ** _Desire_**.

He wants the same thing as him. But the bots are watching, they can't.

His selfish side wins. "Okay, let's go."

Mandy is rushing off the other dolls as Lou walks off with Ox.

"And Nolan." He smiles. "Come to my room after, I want your **_assistance_**."

Ox knew what that meant, but didn't say anything.

The only thing he felt was that he did the fight thing for some reason.

For once, he hoped his gut was right.

The consequences would be too dear if it wasn't.

Lou smiles as he sees the bunny, there was a part of him that was satisfied.

His selfish side had won and it seemed like Ox's did as well.

He silently cheers on the inside for a second. But his facade appears stone cold to those who are around.

He can't let anyone know that he is happy about this, not even himself.

His emotions are suppressed.

He feels nothing now. But the rabbit still haunts his thoughts. In his mind, he still thinks back to the good times. The times where things were great.

**_The times where he felt bliss and not the darkness inside of him._ **

Lou has a feeling that he won't be getting any sleep tonight.


	5. Time In.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They've arrived at the mansions, Let's see what happens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey ya'll! Hope ya like it!
> 
> Comment and kudos if ya like!
> 
> If ya have any ideas for future chapters, don't hesitate to comment them!

_ Step _

_ /st _ _ ɛ _ _ p/ _

_ 1\. the distance covered by a step. _

_2\. a short or easily walked distance_.

Ox's body is tense as he and the leader walk in silence to the location that is intended to be there. Each _step_ he takes is one closer to confronting the past.

God, the past is the one thing that Ox doesn't want to face. He figures that he would rather be in the furnace than this. Yes, he is that afraid.

The fear that he feels constantly terrorises him and Ox isn't sure what his mental state is like anymore.

He knows that it isn't normal though, he knows that it isn't like anybody else's. His hands shake wit the nervousness and fear that refuse to leave him alone.

He fear has always been like this, always haunting his mind and his everyday life. Making his mind seem either crazy or just not normal.

It makes Ox do things that he doesn't tell the others about. Things that aren't worth sharing.

He looks at the scars on his wrist, luckily his fur covers them. But to his eyes, they are still red and just barely there.

The blood from the previous one still stains him, Ox has actually had thoughts about just.... ** _going_**.

Letting death take his souls from his body and maybe taking him to hell where he belonged.

The thought makes him smile in the silence.

But the silence seems to reign, Lou doesn't even look at him, never mind breathing near him. He looks like he's thinking, but his eyes are glazed.

"...Why are you staring?" He looks at the bunny. His eyes scan him for a second to long. "Is there something wrong? I'm perfect."

Lou knows that Ox stared at him, he stared because he reminisces about the past. Reminisces because he knows that Lou isn't himself.

"...You've changed." Ox states, his hands traces she fabric of the suit. "You never wore this that long before."

Lou knows that Ox is going to stain his suit. He somehow doesn't care.

"...We all change." He puts his hand to his chest. "I've just become some doll better. A leader."

"A fake." Ox hisses, tone venomous. "Some doll who you aren't. You forget that I know you. Isn't that right, brother?"

The green doll glared at the leader. This isn't a regular argument. It is actually a rare one.

"I belong to the factory." Lou clenches his hand and he frowns. "They ordered me to change and I did. I dare say that I've become better. Our little separation has done us some good."

His head turns to see the surroundings. The sky is blue and it looks to be a perfect day. Than Goodness, Lou can't handle the rain.

"On some level." Ox frowns. "Jesus Christ, Lou. Why do you obey them?"

They approach his house. It is as white as Ox remembers. There isn't a single stain present. It is all the same as before.

"Because." Lou closes his eyes as he steps inside. "You know that I have no choice. I'm not like the others."

 ** _I'm not like anyone. They don't know who or what I am_**.

"I know." Ox shuts the door and they arrive in the living room. He sits on a couch and looks at a picture. "...You kept it."

The photo is a precious one. One where a favourite memory is stored for both of them. He thought Lou would have gotten rid of it by now.

But no, he kept it. The leader actually fucking kept it.

Ox feels something flutter in his chest, a warm feeling. Something tells him that the leader was an act.

Lou looks out the window with his eyes scanning the dolls. They're just going to their normal day. They don't realise that there things in this world that are broken.

 _Like me._ He thought. _Like my_ ** _soul_** _. I can't_ ** _feel_** _, I watch as they have their dreams and mine are_ ** _repeatedly_** _broken_.

The leader is someone who Lou uses to mask his feelings.

"...I did." His reply is sarcastic. "I had to go hide it though, the factory could come after us again. The risk was to great."

It comes out more caring than intended. Lou despises the bunny.

 _Yet, a part of me longs to keep him close._ He thinks. _I like him_ ** _better_** _than fucking Tuesday. Annoying little doll_.

He shivers at the time he nearly had the deed with her while drunk. She had taken advantage of him.

She had gotten a week's time in the washing machine for that. Lou felt good about himself, no one ever took advantage of him again.

Ox traces the paper and puts it closer to him. This memory is one of his favourites.

_The infamous (_ **_secret_ ** _) duo wondered around perfection. It was night and the darkness covered them from sight._

_"Ox?" Lou asks with his eyes closed. "Where are we going?"_

_The bunny has just recently called him to the house. Lou rushed over as the fear that he could be hurt ruled him._

_Ox grabs the leader's hand again as they walked on the slippery path of perfection. The place always has to be spotless for some reason._

_'Courtesy of the factory. You gotta give credit to the_ **_cleaner_ ** _though. He knows his stuff.'_

_Ox really wants to thank whoever did it later. The floor is never slippery. No one ever has accidents._

**_You can't afford them here_ ** _._

_The sky shines bright that night, the colour is perfect. It's neither to dark nor too light._

_Just real perfect._

_The stars keep their shine, like they sense dolls who actually feel happy and hopeful. Like they're trying to make it known._

_But the two dolls present know it can't happen. It is too much of a risk._

_"Ox!" Lou whines, yes, he whines. "Where are we going?"_

_The leader is himself around the bunny. He knows that he won't judge him. Ox feels proud to have that honour._

_He beams as they approach the destination, Lou feels slightly cold now. He wishes he brought his jacket. "Ox?"_

_"Here!" He exclaims. "Open them!"_

_Lou does and is surprised, the fight is amazing._

_It is a little cafe and the place has dolls who are with each other. The outside reads:_

**_ Little Perfection. _ **

_Lou feels a little irony of the situation, Ox does to. They share as laugh._

_"I found this place a couple of days ago." Ox tells him. "It's really neat!"_

_"Ox." Lou protests wearily. "You know we can't be risking this. We'll be seen."_

_The cross-eyed doll just smiles like an idiot. "That's the thing, I know the owner. We have the place to ourselves!"_

_Lou crosses his arms and examines it. Ox sees the blank expression on his face._

_"Do ya not like it?"_

_The other just stares for another moment, then he laughs. "It's_ **_perfect_ ** _."_

_The bunny cheers with full happiness. The leader just laughs. Then a camera is pulled out._

_"Picture time!"_

_Lou yelps when Ox pulls next to him. Where the hell had the bunny got that thing from?!_

_"I got it from Alex." How had Ox known he thought that. "He sells these things for cheap."_

_He shrugs. "Alright."_

_Lou bends down and lets Ox sling an arm over his shoulder. He holds the piece sign and grins._

_He does the same. He sticks his tongue out and holds up two fingers. They looked like idiots._

**_The picture is took._ **

_"Hey, guys." Angeline comes out. "You coming or what? Oh, hi, Lou! Nice to see the leader taking a break for a change!"_

_He blushes. "Yeah, I guess I am."_

_Ox laughs in happiness. "I managed to get him out for a change."_

_"I can tell."_

_Lou folds his arms and pouts playfully. "Shut up."_

_Ox sees the secret grin on his face, his own grows on his face._

_It's nice to be here, to see Lou let loose. The leader is a good doll._

_Ox knows that he isn't fake around him._

The picture being taken from his hand snaps the doll out of it. He squeals in surprise.

His hand accidentally touches Lou's and the leader recoils like he has been burned. Like flames were on his skin.

Lou gasps as the he feels something shock him, electricity. The connection that he had felt is many years ago had been there.

For a second, he had felt whole again. Like he wasn't the only doll who was broken.

 _But no._ He dusts his suit, there is a smudge. _You are the only doll of_ ** _your_** _kind. The only one who is like_ ** _this_** _._

He closes his eyes for a second, he takes a breath. He feels something in his chest calm.

Lou grasps the picture and look at it. He feels his heart beat a second too long.

Ox has nearly dropped this, Lou can't let that happen. He will admit that he has some attachment to the bunny.

After all, they had been like brothers in the past. Maybe they had been just a little more?

**_More than JUST brothers?_ **

The thought makes him cringe. Lou feels something burn.

_Ridiculous. That thought isn't even allowed._

He is glad that Nolan isn't here yet.

"Lou?" Ox calls. "Are you alright?"

Lou feels like his going to collapse, he searches. Where the fuck was capsule?

He pulls out the cabinet and Ox sees tablets. Lou pops one into his mouth.

_Are those_ **_anti-depressants?_ **

He sees Lou take a few breaths. "Fuck, fuck. Not again."

Ox sees Lou clutch his head, the voices are trying to take over his mind.

He hates them so much.

_Prototype._

_Useless._

_Heartless._

**_Not leaving._ **

The last one affects his core before they disappear. He feels himself wanting to cry.

He doesn't let them fall though, Lou has cried enough.

He feel something on his back. A hand rubbing it. Ox is trying to comfort him.

Lou doesn't know why, but he accepts it. He knows he is fucking up right now, but he doesn't care.

It feels so right to have the bunny near him. To just let him.

He relishes in the touch. Lou leans into it more, the hand goes to his face.

Lou opens his eyes to realise that they were sat down on a couch. When had they gotten here?

"Oh, Lou." The bunny sighs. "I know the real you is here. I forgive you for that song."

He rubs his face, why wouldn't these feelings go away? His chest constricts.

The hand stroked his face and Lou just looks out the window. For a second, it feels like the past. Like it was just the two of them.

Their eyes meet and Nolan isn't here yet.

 ** _Nolan isn't here yet_**.

Something clicks in Lou's brain, and his body reacts before his mind.

Ox and his lips connect. He pulls the other close out of sheer desperation, he needs to something to stabilise himself.

Lou feels the other shriek in surprise, but moans as he kisses him. Ox then finally responds (why, why did it take so long, **_so long-_** ) and his hands go in his shoulders.

Their lips oddly fit together as they do this. Lou's hands wrap around the other as he pulls him even closer.

He doesn't know what he is doing, he just needs to feel something again.

 ** _This void had a demand to be filled_**.

And it was filled. Ox grabs Lou as much as he grabs him. He feels like this is right.

Why were they doing this?

The thing they used to have in the past comes up, their minds replays it in their heads.

They just need to be themselves again. To feel like they weren't half of any wholes.

To feel like they were together, not like they were separated beings from their bodies. To feel like their souls were actually theirs.

To feel like something belonged to them.

Lou clutches Ox closer, he doesn't want this to go. He wants the void to stay filled like this. Why was it refusing to let him go?!

His hands start to stroke the bunny's fur, and he hits the spot that he knows Ox likes. His leg starts shaking. He likes it.

Their eyes are closed, but they don't see the doll that's in the doorway.

"L-Lou?"

The blonde snaps out of the trance and slowly looks behind him.

_God, no._

"N-Nolan." Lou stands up, Ox sits up and the couch. He looked surprised. "God, I can explain. Just give me a chance."

Lou's heart thinks as the other just looks away, he is guilt tripping him.

**_He is going to leave you._ **

**_He doesn't love you._ **

He knows that to be true. But Nolan looks back with a smile, like he forgives him.

Lou craves that. The leader act has fallen now that he is inside his mansion.

Nolan approaches him, Lou feels smaller for a second.

"I'm sorry.."

His feels arms around his torso. Nolan is hugging him? The doll is confused.

" _I told you before._ " He whispers. " _I forgive you._ "

Ox watched as the two interact. Lou grabs the other's hand. He doesn't want Nolan to go.

He clutches it and turns around. "Do you love Luckybat?"

Ox doesn't reply, Lou just rolls his eyes

"There's a guest room across the hall from mine. Stay there tonight."

Lou's tone is cold, not like earlier when he warmly kissed the rabbit. His hand tightened around Nolan's, he needs him right now.

The door shuts with a bang. Ox is left there alone. His finger traces his lips, it feels warm.

He wishes he could do it again.

***

_ Bring _

_ /br _ _ ɪ _ _ ŋ/ _

_ Verb _

_ 1\. cause (someone or something) to come to a place. _

_2\. take or go with (someone or something) to a place_.

Lou and Nolan kiss as soon as they go upstairs, Lou _brings_ him to the top. Their arms are around each other, he can't stop getting enough.

He wants to feel something again. Something that isn't the void that haunts his mind and body.

He wants to make his body react to this, make his mind react to this. To make his souls react to this.

Leader is the one who takes care of the dolls daily, leader is the one who rules them all with the confidence that Lou is known. Leader is the one who is the bad guy.

Leader is the one who becomes, the one who he refers himself to on a daily basis. Leader is the one who hides in the deepest pits of his mind.

Leader is the voices who speaks in his head. He whispers promises, praises, insults, truths, lies.

He is the one who everydoll fears and loves. The one who every doll knows. Lou becomes him when he can't handle a situation like earlier with those dolls.

He sighs when his back hits the door, his feet skid the carpet when Nolan pins him. He knows that the other is mad. His hand is on his and squeezes hard.

Lou oddly likes the punishment, he takes it like a good leader. After all, the other wasn't in control.

Leader is how he copes with the problems, leader is the one who he created in his mind. His natural mechanism.

But it's all Lou's fault? He doesn't know.

Is it? He doesn't know. I don't know.

He doesn't tell the difference between reality and fantasy here. His room is a place where there is no cameras.

(The factory watched constantly, **_constantly_** , they **_never_** let him _off_ the hook, **_paranoia_** plays a role, it plays a **_role-_** _)_

He knows that he needs to be watched ever since the incident, it's the reason he knows how to put in a show.

(Be the fake, fake ** _doll-_**..No, he **_is_** the fake _doll-_ )

Be a little puppet, pawn? He doesn't know the answer. He belongs to them all the time, he doesn't have free will.

Not here, not anyway. It's why he sometimes rebels against them. Dolls think Lou to be a _'golden boy'_ or a **_'perfect doll'_**.

He is none of those things. Nothing can redeem the things that he has done, become. He is nothing like the rumours say. He isn't free.

He is trapped. The factory make him stay.

(He does remember in the past where they were more _lenient_ , more **_willing_**. He remembers being _happy_ , being **_sane-_** )

His sanity is... _questionable_ now. It registers what he does and the bad things that have happened.

The things that he knows he isn't guilty of. He only follows the rules, he is perfect. He follows what they say.

Lou knows that he is the bad guy. He can admit that.

He knows that he has done things that have been deemed ** _'criminally insane'_**. Dolls words, not his.

(Like the time where he sent _multiple_ dolls to the furnace for not being _perfect_ , the **_smudges_** , the **_stains_** , the _happy_ looks on their **_faces-_** )

He hates happiness, he hates those that crave it. Like him, he hates himself. Lou admits that he tried to commit suicide once.

Nolan saved him, it's part of why he's with him. He feels like he owes him for saving him and encouraging him to go on.

Nolan brings him back to reality by grabbing his face. Lou has a habit of going into his thoughts.

It's partly why he puts on a show.

(His thoughts are the things he has _control_ of, he digs deeper into **_his_** mind like he _owns_ it. He knows that he doesn't own anything else, he _needs it-_ )

"Are you thinking again?"

Lou looks at Nolan. "Yes, sorry. It's those uglydolls, they're...persistent."

He isn't lying, he was partly thinking about them. They really are something, Lou actually admires them in a way. No doll else has ever tried to stay.

Not like Ox.

(The times where he _actually laughed_ , the times where he could put a **_simple fucking smile_** on his face. Where he _didn't_ put on a _show_ , where he was _pure_. Before the **_rules_** came into **_play-_** )

The doll who made him feel sane. The doll who made him feel.

The rules play a large role. His status depends on them, they can change any second.

He knows they he needs to do something **_to get rid of the doll-_**

"They can be." Lou's head snaps to hear him, it causes a slight pain in his neck. "I can't believe you did that song though."

He smiles. "I needed to do something to get a little revenge."

(Not the _proper_ one he would want, Lou's mind _plans_ something _big_ , he doesn't have to think to know that _leader_ has a **_way_**. It's _sadistic_ , _twisted_ , **_not him_** , he wants to do it **_his_** way, an idea _might_ come to **_him-_** )

He wants to do something else, not a song. More practical. Old school. Not like where he could just throw them out.

His reputation is fragile. He could go form hero to zero in less than a second.

They dolls are pretty, but they have minds of their own. Intelligence can be a tactic, it makes up for the lack of brawn the dolls are given.

The factory make them like this so they don't rebel.

Lou really hates them.

"I guess." Nolan puts a hand on his chest. "I guess that's why everyone calls us **_Nolou_**."

Their ship name, dolls are good at coming up with those. Their minds are programmed like a group of gossiping people from the big world.

Lou only knows based on what he saw. He has memories like the rest of them.

"I guess."

He kisses Nolan again before he can respond, the doll is the nicest, boldest, he's met.

(But his heart **_craves_** something else, _different_ , it wants the _old_ thing that was in his life _all_ those years _ago_ , the things that _haunt_ , **_plague_** his mind in a way that he _doesn't want_ it to, **_he hates Ox-_** )

_Then why does my heart ache?_

Lou brings the other to his bed, their shirts are long gone. He doesn't know how long has passed since they've kissed.

He hits the mattress with a thump, he hates how big his bed is. It leaves too much room for him to move, want somebody there.

**_Is it bad that I want the bunny here?_ **

He doesn't know what right and wrong is, he just knows that he is capable of thought.

Why is Lou so bad? Why does he not appreciate what he has?

He has an empire, mansion, a **_fucking_** boyfriend who loves him.

Why does he feel so damn empty?

Nolan travels down more and Lou arches his back at what he's doing. He sucks, he twirls. He's giving him pleasure. His mouth of good.

He moans as Nolan continues. It's so good, wrong, but good. The tip is swirled around and he moans.

This feels so good.

Nolan should be the one on Lou's mind, but he can't, he just can't.

_It this what being apathetic feels like?_

It certain feels like it. Lou knows what he should feel, but he just can't.

He knows he did back in the past. A memory comes to the surface.

_He travels with Ox to a place where they have been before. The two walk and walk and don't talk._

_Lou knows that he rhymed, but he doesn't care. He just feels joy at the moment._

_He and Ox had their first official kiss. Last night of all nights! He felt so god damn happy!_

_He isn't afraid to admit it, it fills his core with a funny feeling. He doesn't mind it for once, Lou embraces it._

(Especially since he **_never_** felt this before, since his mind plays the images of dolls _going_ over and over again, **_always leaving-_** )

_His hands clap together and he smiles for once. It's sincere, it's something he hasn't done since he first got here._

_His smile is one of pure_ **_fucking_ ** _happiness. And around and a kiss._

_But Lou has never kissed anyone before Ox, he still feels the fact that he had received one so...good._

_He knows that it's stupid to go on about, but this is his thoughts, the audience are just viewing them._

(Especially since he has been _watched_ , _viewed_ , he has no _control_ of privacy that he _craves_ , **_needs_** , he's forced to **_constantly_** look over his **_shoulder-_** )

_Lou knows he is paranoid. But it's part of who he is._

_No one can know the real him._

_Ox partly does, Leader has tried to come out multiple times. Lou turns stone cold at the weirdest moments. He doesn't want to._

_"What are you grinning about?"_

_He looks. "Just about last night."_

_Ox grins, it's a goofy one, a lovestruck one. One that suits him. "I see, I'm the one who initiated it."_

_"It was my first one." Lou playfully jabs. "I got nervous."_

_"The leader? Nervous?" Ox mock gasps. "I wouldn't believe it."_

(He has _no_ idea how **_nervous_** Lou was. How much he was _worried_ that he would **_mess_** up. Make the bunny not be with **_him_** , a fear that **_haunts him-_** )

_"Yep." His mouth refuses to go to a frown. "I really was."_

_His mouth still goes into a smile, but now it is fake. It is one that he shows daily to everyone._

_"Huh." Ox's hand grabs his. "I guess that's understandable. It was_ **_our_ ** _first one after all,_ **_my_ ** _first one to."_

_"I guess it's both."_

_It really is both. Lou's never kissed a doll until now._

( _Lies_ , he has kissed a doll **_before_** , but they're _empty_. Lips connect to _fill_ a void that **_cannot_** be filled. Not until **_now_** where he hasn't felt it, he **_craves that-_** )

_"I have kissed a doll before." Lou confesses. "But they're empty. Your the true doll who I like."_

_It isn't a lie, he truly likes the doll, but love is another term. He is only learning this foreign feeling. He doesn't know just yet._

_Ox smiles, it's_ **_strained_ ** _a little. He doesn't show how upset he is. "That's okay, I don't need to know about your_ **_past_ ** _romances."_

_Lou feels a stab, he doesn't know why. He feels guilt, but he has been here so long._

_It's kind of inevitable that he has found a few dates here and there._

( _Especially_ since he just _wants_ to feel _something_ , is it bad that he just wants **_someone_**? He _doesn't_ think so, but others _do_ , they call it being _selfish_ , they call it **_seeking_** something that you **_don't deserve-_** )

_Lou works hard for what he has. "I know, I just wanted to mention it."_

_He swears that something is on the bunny's face, a flash of anger. Like he doesn't want to hear it. Like he doesn't want to be near him._

_Lou frowns, his mouth finally moves. "Are you okay?"_

_"Yep!"_

_Ox moves to walk past him, there is a brush to his leg. Lou feels a sting, he clutches his chest._

_His head bends, and for a second._

**_He doesn't feel_ ** _._

Lou screams in pleasure when Nolan hits the right spot. He muffled it by the pillow.

He is still aware that Ox is here. He could be listening right now. In his room, not at the door.

That could be creepy.

Nolan goes rough and Lou sees stars. He almost wants to pass out.

(He _forgets_ the past for a _second_ , forgets the _constant loneliness_ and _hurt_ he feels on a daily _basis_ , the _void_ that _demands_ things _from_ him, he forgets **_Leader_** , a doll that he **_becomes daily-_** )

He forgets the pain and pleasure enters his core. Nolan may think that he had taken his innocence, but he hasn't.

Lou gave his virginity to a doll named Ox.

He closes his eyes-

***

-He opens them to feel a sleepiness that isn't familiar. Lou doesn't know how long he was passed out for.

He just knows it has been a long time. Lou sighs and tries to close his eyes again.

 _Uglydolls need to go._ The thoughts comes. **_They want to ruin the empire I have WORKED for._**

Lou opens them and growls. The sleepiness suddenly fades. He is suddenly wide awake.

Nolan's head is in the crook of his neck, but Lou doesn't care. He doesn't care for the warmth that he is supposed to be feeling, the care he is supposed to feel.

He replaces himself with a pillow and gets up. He puts a suit on, instinct even if he is staying in his own house.

He walks out and shuts the door. He needs to get this out of him. He needs to sooth the boiling anger that threatens his core.

(He _knows_ that he isn't _supposed_ to be like **_this_** , but jealousy is a _common_ emotion here, _pretties_ can be _prettier_ , and he is the prettiest doll here, anger is bound to be **_present_** sometime in **_every doll-_** )

Lou growls. "Why does this bother me? I just need to get this over with."

He whines as he clutches his head, he doesn't realise that he has arrived at a room.

**_Get it over with._ **

**_Pretty doll~_ **

**_Destined to never leave~_ **

He sees that and knows everyday of his life. Lou clenched his fists as tears threaten to fall.

At least Nolan and Ox are asleep, they don't see this. The insanity that takes over him.

(It does _everytime_ , he can't stop it even **_if_** he wanted to, _society_ has made him _develop_ like this. He _can't_ stop his mind from _thinking_ , _forming_ , **_plotting-_** )

But Lou knows that he needs to do this. Needs to get this thing out from his chest, mind, heart.

_"Ugly Dolls"_

He slams the door open, he growls. Lou hates this.

_"I'll crush them all_  
_Destroy their dream"_

He walks through the room with his fists clenched, Lou needs to get this out, the anger.

_"To save my perfect empire_  
_Nothing's too extreme."_

He walks past his his paintings, ornaments, and even a statue a statue of himself

Lou admits he is that that vain. Kinda hard not to be since you receive attention and praise nearly all the time. It's bound to raise anyone's ego.

_"And I know how to do it_  
_Without looking too uncouth"_

He approaches the window and his reflection appears. It is a doll who cheats and lies constantly.

It's also a doll who used to feel alive in the past. Now Lou just feels dead inside.

_"Plan it so foul, gross, hideous, nasty."_

His face does into insane, his eyes shine, and his mouth curls into a grin that isn't his.

Lou feels both sick and satisfied as he sings this.

**_"they'll never see the ugly truth."_ **

He shuts the blinds and turns around. Lou hums as the void backs down.

He laughs a little, that song so short.

"Lou?"

 _Shit_.

He turns around to see Ox there. God **_dammit_** , has he heard him?

"Yes." He replied calmly. "What are you doing up?"

"I heard singing." His eyes narrow. "Why?"

He knows Lou too well.

"Just...in a mood." Not exactly a lie. "Felt like it."

_Not going to tell you anything else._

Ox seems to tired to ask. Thank God. Lou doesn't want to answer any...unnecessary questions.

Luckily his smile is so perfect that even Ox doesn't see through the act. "...Okay. I guess that's fine."

Lou folds his arms as the green dolls leaves. What did he expect? Some kind of conversation?

_We're past that. There is nothing to talk about._

**_There is plenty to talk about._ **

He knows that. Lou slams the door on his way out. He knows that there is things to talk about, a lot of things to talk about.

Lou just doesn't accept it.

He approached his room. He takes his shirts and shoes off and slip into the bed.

He brings Nolan closer to him, the other lays his head into his neck. Lou doesn't mind.

He settles down to sleep. He has a lesson to teach tomorrow.

He has a feeling that it's going to be hell with the Uglydolls there.

Things were going to change.

He just knows they are.


	6. Outline.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey ya'll! Hope you enjoy this!
> 
> Comment and kudos if ya like it!

_ Shed _

_ / _ _ ʃɛ _ _ d/ _

_ Noun _

_ 1\. park (a vehicle) in a depot. _

_2\. a simple roofed structure used for garden storage, to shelter animals, or as a workshop_.

Mandy walks along with ugly dolls to go to the _shed_ that had been described as a suite. She feels numb as she does. She just is.

She has been alone all her life, Mandy has never known true friendship in the institute. She has never known what it was to have actual friends.

Some may say that friendship was magic, and she knew some dolls that did (she hated the ones that found that damn my little pony show). But it really wasn't.

Mandy knows that it isn't. She has always been the outcast doll of the society that the factory has created for them. She is known as the spy girls' tag along

She can't really blame the dolls for thinking that though, she is always seen with them. She just looks like the outsider of the group.

But she also wants to be accepted, wants someone to at least like her for who she is.

 _Is that hard hard to ask for?_ She thinks. _To just want someone who doesn't bully on an almost fucking constant daily basis. It it hard?_

Mandy doesn't know if it is, she just knows that all her life, she has had to play the role of the little outcast doll that interferes with the business of others.

She never even wants this role, Mandy just keeps silent and obeys commands from those who are higher up than her.

You all know who the higher ups are.

_If you don't. It's Lou, the bots, the_ **_fucking_ ** _factory._

If there is any common ground between her and the spy girls, is that they have one thing in comment between all of them. Their hatred.

The factory has made Mandy not like the rest of the dolls, she has something that they all don't.

A **_curse_**.

At least to her it is, Mandy is so damn different from the other type twelve dolls, and they all know it. It feels like they all just know.

Her... _imperfection_. (It's what Lou calls it, she just says **_default_** ). Is something that only she, the spy girls, and the leader know about.

It often feels like it's the reason she is disliked here. Rumours can fly, and like a bird's song, it will spread and everyone will hear it.

**_All it takes is one little mistake._ **

She knows that Lou isn't... ** _Mr_**. _Perfect_. Physically, yes. His looks stand above all dolls, even the males are fans when they should be jealous. It's confusing.

Mental is a challenge (she is **_not_** saying that he is mentally challenged), Mandy means that she doesn't know how his mind operates. Doesn't know his true nature.

Sometimes it feels like she just sees a facade. Lou is certainly good at leading, he is bound to pick up a things or two about acting.

Mandy is not blind though, she saw how his demeanour changes when the bunny spoke or even was near.

_Could he be_ **_the Ox_ ** _all those years ago? I mean, I_ **_barely_ ** _knew him, but he was_ **_nice_ ** _. Heard that_ **_even_ ** _Lou liked_ **_him_ ** _._

That...this is saying. Especially in her thoughts, Mandy is surprised that her mind comes up with something like that.

Sometimes it feels like she doesn't have free reign.

"Do this, do that." Her mouth mutters. "I hate those phrases. Can I ever have a day off? I hate the spy girls."

She really does have hatred in her heart, Mandy has always been ordered around, she has always been the one who everyone thought was gullible.

She is smarter than _they_ ** _fucking_** think. Pretty can be pretty, she knows that, but the factory made one error.

Giving the dolls free will. Wills that allow them to think and bloom as both dolls and people. Giving them _personalities_ , _jobs_ , even _intelligence_.

The factory isn't as smart as they like to think. Even they aren't perfect at times.

It's something that her, the spy girls, and even Lou take pleasure in. It's rare they outsmart it.

Mandy's hands are folded in front of her as she walks with the ugkydolls.

_They just chat and chat and chat and chat and they just_ **_fucking chat-_ **

Mandy just wants from them. Is that so hard to ask for? She knows it is the type twelve doll inside her that wants this. Her normal side fights the urge to yell at the uglydolls.

 _A perfect doll restrains themselves, they put on a stupid, fake smile to put on a show_.

Mandy wants to obey this, but a frowns takes over, she feels the order to be perfect. To not be bothered by this **_utter, insensitive chattering-_**

She takes a breath, it always helps. She needs to be calm.

A hand touches hers and she looks to see the pink doll there.

_Wasn't her name, Roxie? No, it was_ **_Moxy_ ** _. I'm stupid. Emma was right, I am deaf as well as bloody_ **_blind_ ** _._

"Yes?" Mandy asks. "What do you want?"

"Are you alright?" Moxy is concerned. "You seem a little...down?"

The purple haired doll feels a smile touch her lips. Like Lou, her and the others put on a show.

"I'm fine." Her hands fold tighter. "I'm just thinking."

_Not really a lie._

Mandy doesn't want to admit that the pink doll intrigues her. She seems more optimistic than the orange doll.

_Wasn't her name, Wage? Such as downer._

That thought is actually funny, she chuckles a little. The orange doll turns as if she had sensed the thought.

Mandy bows her head as the anger sinks to her, she feels like she is being suffocated. She feels like she is being brought here again.

She closes her eyes as they approach a building that every doll dreads to go.

( _Ridiculous_ how they all seem to fecking _fear_ this this _thing_ , Mandy has seen some even _scream_ and _run_ in terror **_if it's mentioned-_** ).

Like she has said before, _utterly, predictably_ ** _ridiculous_** how they run of the slightest thing is **_imperfect_**.

_I blame_ **_Lou_ ** _for that, I am the_ **_calmer_ ** _. Everydoll comes to me like I'm some kind of_ **_therapist_ ** _. That isn't even_ **_my_ ** _damn job._

Moxy talk again, she shrugs. She barely knows the doll. "If you say so. I only wanna help."

"Heh." Mandy chuckles bitterly. "No one ever helps each other here. Trust me, Pinkie. It's better to live life ignorant than trying to understand those who know it's darkness."

_That wasn't meant to be said out loud._

Moxy's face shifts from concerned to a mix of it and confusion. Both are present in her eyes and body.

Mandy feels a slight warmth. No one has ever asked if she is alright.

 _Maybe this doll is a little different_.

The thought makes her stomach clench a little. What the hell is she thinking?

No dolls was ever different. Just the same old thing, lazy, trying to be perfect, etc.

Everything just feels bland and Mandy had given up trying find her purpose years ago. She sometimes questions it, but the hope is just dead.

Nothing would ever reignite it. It was a fire that had burned too long. The ashes are too scattered.

She feels like a broken toy trapped in a perfect doll's body. But she lives here, nothing can ever get her out of it.

She and the uglydolls ( _who even came up with that name? Fitting, but strange_ ), approach the dreaded building and Mandy just wants to leave already.

_Why did he get Kitty or something to do this? She has better social skills. Hell, even_ **_Tuesday_ ** _does._

She is not sorry for that thought. Everyone references Tuesday due to _absolute_ ** _stupidity_**.

 _Well, more like naivety. Not intelligent, but obeys and wicked. Manipulative. One doll to watch for_.

She shivers at the last time she pissed her off. The spy girls have the power to throw some doll in the washer.

Three days, Mandy had been there for three days. The trauma of the hitting, the bruises, the stains.

_And everyone wonders why I have anxiety._

It turns out that trauma could come in earlier ways than expected. In some way, her and Lou have something in common.

The trauma, the lives that they have left, she is glad that she doesn't like Lou, dolls ship and the leader together.

_Don't they call us_ **_Landy?_ **

A stupid ship name in her opinion, but she cannot help what is said. Dolls can talk, even when they shouldn't.

She does an earned eye roll. Dolls are dolls, she is unfortunately one.

She wishes that she wasn't. She wishes that she could just die.

The door opens and the ugkydolls are let inside. But the pink one ( _remember that her name is Moxy, stupid_ ), no, Moxy, gives her a concerned look.

"You can talk to me if you aren't alright."

Mandy huffs. "Trust me, Pinkie. My problems are for me to know."

The other ugkydolls don't hear them, Mandy knows how to keep her voice at level.

Being with spy girls has helped in a way, she knows how to be sneaky and manipulative.

She just doesn't play that role very often.

"Here is the supply's shed-"

She stops herself, Mandy knows how to lie. She does. She clears her throat.

"Suite." Mandy chuckles nervously. "Here's the supply suite. Your home away from home."

 _More like a shit dump_.

The uglydolls react... ** _enthusiastic_**. They're _happy_.

They rush to the shed, Mandy lets out a laugh. They seem happy.

 _They haven't faced the darkness of the world. They don't know the true colours_.

The dolls are excited as before as the door barely fits all off them. Especially the grey one.

 _Babo? Yeah, it's that. He seems...cheery. Not a bad trait for an ugkydoll_.

Lord knows how many pretty dolls are the opposite.

It's amazing Mandy still has some of her sanity. She's surprised her, the spy girls, Nolan, and Lou do.

The darkness certainly made them feel like they were losing it. It just did.

Mandy clutches her chest for a second, it just had to be night?

 _That's when it haunts us mos_ t.

She listens to the dolls laughs and feels a chuckle.

_They are so naive. Wait until they discover the darkness._

Mandy knows that they will be shattered and their innocence would be broken.

She oddly can't wait for that to happen.

The dolls go through the door and looked skeins impressed. They say things Mandy can't comprehend.

"Yeah.." Her hands Gowan on the door. "...It's industrial chic.."

"Industrial chic?" Ugkydolls question sas he climbs on the box. "There are boxes! And a mop!"

"Dibs on the mop!" Babo whacks as he shouts it. "And a bucket of dirty warren!"

The doll type twelve in Mandy makes her step back in fight.

( _Dirty_ means _stains_ , stains means _not_ being _perfect_ , _not_ being **_perfect_** means Lou will _not let her go_ to the _big world_ , which means that she will _never_ get a damn fucking kid to ** _adore her-_** )

Mandy smiles instead, the thoughts stir, but she can handle it. **_Desperation_** makes one put on a show.

 _At least I have a chance, not like some others. Some are trapped here, like me, but I help Lou and that, I have a chance at freedom_.

She sees Babo take the bucket of the frowning Uglydog-

 _-I just realised. Uglydog, Ugkydolls. How original for a name. Nolan would piss himself of laughter at the irony_.

"Check out the spare tire!" Wage shouts, she wears one around her waist.

"This is my other tire!"

Moxy jumps off a bunk and runs around in happiness.

" ** _This is perfect for us_**."

Mandy's hands clench. Too much chattering.

 _They're too_ ** _happy_** _, don't they realise their_ ** _mistake_** _, this will_ ** _never_** _be more than a_ ** _dream_**.

"Calm down." Mandy shushes harshly. "I didn't get your names?"

I'm always forgetting them.

"Oh!" Moxy smiles ( _cutely, Mandy feels a blush grow_ ). She points to her friends. "This is Babo, wage, Luckybat, and Uglydog. Ox is the green bunny you saw earlier. Also, I'm Moxy!"

Trust me, pinks. I know who Ox is. Everyone knows who he is.

"I'm Mandy." She replied instead. "You might want to watch out for, Lou is not gonna make it easy."

"Well." _How is Moxy so happy?_ "I say, bring it on, Louis!"

Mandy smiled a bit, Moxy seems like a good doll.

"Without his criticism." She speaks. "We wouldn't be where we are, so...just stay out of his way."

Just a warning. Even the spy girls would agree that this is necessary.

She goes to leave, but her head bangs against the door. The pain makes her fall back against the floor.

_Damn, my blurry vision._

Mandy doesn't realise that her glasses have fallen, the things that have the cure to her blindness. The things that have also ruined her life.

 _Lou got to the bots to make me them. I can only wear it when other aren't around. Still, one of the kindest things he's ever done_.

"Cool glasses!"

Uglydog snatches then before Mandy's hand does. She internally panics and the anger builds.

_Stupid blue hair uglydoll bastard._

He wears them around his one eye, that stupid eye that is as stupid as he is.

He passes them to the others and they wear them. They act like it's the most fascinating thing in the world.

"Please."

He passes it to Babo.

"Please."

He passes it to Moxy.

"Please!"

She passes it to Wage. Mandy feels the stress and her doll side take over, her anger takes over. It's built over the years.

It finds itself a chance to break out now.

" ** _GIVE ME THE FUCKING GLASSES!_** "

They all gasp and step back out of fear. Mandy's anger forces her to watch as this happens.

_Uglydolls make you upset, uglydolls must pay._

That little voice is her doll type twelve side. The perfectionist in her would do _anything_ to keep the secret.

She pants as she fights for control, both the normal and doll side are one with Mandy.

But she allows her inner doll to come out, her demons.

" _Give. Me. Them._ " The factory made her like this, a default. She hates it. " ** _Now_**."

Moxy shakily walks over and hands them to her. Mandy stares apathetically.

She hates the pink doll for doing that, she hates the ugkydolls for taking the one thing that she actually owns.

"Don't tell Lou." She hisses and goes to the door. "This is the _institute_ of _perfection_. **_Imperfection_** isn't _accepted_."

She leaves before they can say anything. Mandy decides to put her glasses on.

She walks in the street with tears in her eyes, nobody ever accepted her and those uglies had nearly broken the one thing that made her complete.

To some, glasses might be a minor thing. But to Mandy, they allowed her to see, to hope that her vision could be proper one day.

 _Only hope though, it will never come true_.

Dolls have told Mandy things that have traumatised, affected her. She has been told things that others shouldn't hear.

She goes to the house and opens the door. Mandy closes it and sobs as she slides down it.

Her emotions are loose and she can't contain them. The guilt haunts her and her normal side is in control.

Her doll side hides and is dormant until she losss conform again. She hates herself so much.

Moans make her come out of her sobbing. She gets up and finds the strength to walk. She wipes her eyes.

_You can't be weak. Especially not here._

Oh yeah, Mandy lives with the spy girls. No surprise there, she doesn't even know why she does.

She walks down the hallway and hears them come from Tuesday's room.

When she checks the door, she sees the girls ducking each other. She covers her mouth to hold the bile.

 _I am not against lesbianism. I just didn't need to see that_.

She hears the climax cry and the pants of the girls. She had listened to this so many times that she was immune.

Mandy has no choice, the walls are thin and sleep is futile.

The door opens and she steps back. Lydia is there.

_In her underwear._

"Girl." She eyes her up and down. "Why are you crying? It causes frown lines."

It's a normal occurrence to see the girls like this. It's routine.

"Nothing." She replies. "Just nothing."

Lydia shrugs and Kitty comes out along with Tuesday.

"So, you three are really a couple?"

Mandy doesn't have anything against **_polyamory_**. She thinks it's brave that the girls don't care.

"More like an experiment." Tuesday giggles, her mouth stifles it. "We decided to try it out, I do bottom from time to tim-"

Kitty covers her mouth and has a blush on her face. It burns bright red. Lydia isn't affected.

"Ignore her, she's a moron."

"I am not!"

Lydia rolls her eyes. "Girl, shut up. We get it. Anyway, why were you eyeing the pink doll earlier?"

Her hand links with Kitty's, it shows they're a couple, then Tuesday joins, they all are together.

Mandy blushes. "What do you mean?"

"Mandy." Kitty sighs. "If you wanna be with her, we have nothing against it, even Lou doesn't. But we all know how it would turn out. The _rules_ say we can't."

She does, Mandy knows the consequences, but she feel something around the pink doll.

She wasn't going to let it go.

"...Good night." She walks away from them, the girls were just bitches to talk to. " _I hate them.._ "

Mandy slams her door shut and climbs onto her bed. She doesn't bother getting changed.

She ignores the command of her full doll side to. She just doesn't care.

She closes her eyes to sleep. She hopes that she doesn't the the nightmares for once.

Unfortunately for Mandy, she does.

***

_ Teach _

_ /ti _ _ ː _ _ t _ _ ʃ _ _ / _

_ Verb _

_ 1\. assign or regard as belonging to a particular category. _

_ 2\. impart knowledge to or instruct (someone) as to how to do something. _

Lou is still at his mansion, but he is ready. Earlier than usual, but he has a class to teach. He can't afraid for disappoint the factory again.

His mind doesn't register it as teaching though, he views it as a way to just be rid of the dolls if he does the task what he had been asked to do.

After all, what other choice does he have?

He just needs to do the one thing he is designed for, is that hard to ask from the factory? But he sometimes just sees them as pieces of shits.

 _They made me like this, a god damn teacher. They made me into someone who barely knows what they're doing_.

Lou feels the anger build, he feels himself just want to curl up and die, he feels the urge to _grab a damn knife and_ ** _slit his throat so deep so that no one can save him-_**

He's in the kitchen as this happens, the irony that a single thought can form when your in the area it needs to come up with the thing it does.

He rolls his eyes, Louis had his jacket off. His house is too hot to have it on. He has his white shirt underneath though.

 _After all, I'm too 'quaint' to leave it somewhere messy. I am more fun than the rumours let on_.

Lou is not deaf or as oblivious as others think. He can hear and see dolls talking. It was called good vision and hears them talking and talking and chatting shit about him.

_"I bet he isn't as_ **_perfect_ ** _as he seems."_

_"Wonder if he is just a_ **_fake_ ** _."_

_"I heard that he used to break the_ **_rules_ ** _in the_ **_past_ ** _."_

Lou has more fans than haters, but that doesn't mean they every doll isn't negative towards him. Some stare in _adoration_ , some stare in absolute **_repulsion_**.

He knows how it works. The perfect doll gets what he wants, and the others are left in the dust to suffer in the shadows.

_They don't know that I want freedom. They don't know I would do anything to die at this point._

What else is there to live for? All he has is his fame and the purpose to teach others to do the thing he has always wanted.

 _How is that fair?_.

He doesn't know if others are like the way he is, if the darkness has ever taken over them like it had taken over him, or _if they have ever had so_ ** _much negative thoughts to the point where he-_**

Those thoughts are what drive Lou everyday, he sometimes interrupts them when he needs to, interrupts them when he thinks things that don't need to be thought.

Interrupts them when they get to the point of him doing something he'll surely regret.

A sigh leaves him as he clutches the counter. A thing that is his support for when he feels like he is going to collapse.

(But _sometimes_ , just _sometimes_ , he feels so **_high_** on the _insanity_ that he **_forgets_** that he is someone that _can't_ do **_anything_** , be _anything_ that he **_wants to be-_** )

Another sigh leaves his mouth and Lou ( _I hate myself on a daily basis_ ), looks over to the door. He can just tell that someone is coming. He prays for it to be Ox.

...No, Nolan walks through the door with a proud stride. A stride that is tainted ever so slightly with a limp. Like his limp has been placed there.

Yeah. Lou can dominate. He fucked the other with roughness. Roughness that resulted in this.

 _Too bad that I imagined him as Ox_.

Submissiveness is something that he takes lightly. Others have to bow to him or they would suffer. He always does like it when they know just an ounce of his pain.

He has always suffered more than they ever would. Nothing of others could ever compare to his suffering. Others' mental states were normal, only damaged knew others who were damaged.

Lou admits that there are others like him. Mandy is one of course. He fucks her on occasions. Nolan doesn't know about the infidelity.

_And he never will._

They say that a secret _spilled_ is a secret _gone_ (at least, that's what he hears). Perfection never allowed taints in _reputations_. Or anything of the sort.

If you weren't worthy, you **_weren't worthy_**.

A king's throne only belongs to someone who can handle the responsibility of the burdens and secrets of the darkness in the institute.

And Lou is the king, he doesn't wear a crown, no. But he _does_ command others to do what he wants.

He can make the spy girls as an example. They act mindless (he questions if Tuesday actually is sometimes, he is sorry for that thought). But they obey his word.

One reason for that?

 ** _Looks_**.

"Pretty makes perfect" He mumbles, closing his eyes for a second. "Pretty makes perfect. You are perfect, you are **_fucking_** perfect."

He chants that over and over. He doesn't stop even as a certain bunny walks in. Lou feels like he is immune to his hearing.

(He is _detached_ , not hearing, not _connected_. He can never be _connected_. He _doesn't_ have **_emotions_** , he can't feel _emotions_ , he **_hates_** his **_creators-_** )

"Lou?" The blonde turns. Ox stands there. That stare at each other. "I just want to say...morning? If that's okay with the _grand master_."

There is the wit he recognises from those years again. The mouth that had once done things from kissing to pleasure.

Lou would always admit internally that he missed it.

"Yeah.." He shrugged, glad Nolan had gone for the morning. He swore that he had been on the urge of just running away from him. "You too, I guess. I'm glad to see the bunny who can actually accomplish something ** _apart from failing_** can complete the task of getting up in the morning."

Ox winces from that intended insult. He knows he isn't off the hook. He isn't naive, he knows when a jab or insult is coming.

Living in Perfection provides that as a sixth sense.

The duo are glad the unwelcomed third part has left the room and hopefully out of their life (actually, it's just Ox who hopes it. Ridiculous, he knows). He knows it's Nolan.

"Is he truly in love?" The bunny asks the blonde, going closers. He grins. "Tell me, **_MY_** _Leader_. Does you heart flutter when he goes close. When he touches you, when he pleasures you in the bed we used to be in?"

Lou doesn't answer. He clenched his hands on the sink and turns his back. Their gazes cannot meet or he will be lost in the spell of past love.

_Two dolls sit in a house. In a bedroom that belongs to a blonde leader who has a bunny sitting on his lap. They nuzzle. They kiss. They cuddle._

_"Lou~" Ox sing songs. The bunny looks at the man who has captured his heart. "What's wrong? Aren't you glad we managed to get away?"_

_Lou's eyes are closed as he strokes the bunny's ears. Soft, furry, coloured. The works of a happy accident. An accident he wishes he could just keep to himself._

_"Hmm?.." Lou hums and smiles a little. His emotions don't show. "Oh, I am. I am so, so happy. I want the world to know that I am."_

_An emotion flickers and Ox feels afraid for a second. He looks at the one who he loves with all his heart and who his mind, body, soul belong to._

_'Something is wrong."_

_Both know. Both don't acknowledge it._

**_Both are too blinded with love to see any toxicity._ **

Lou's eyes open. He pants from the pure exhaustion of resisting to sort out the threat from his mind.

The threat of memories.

He hates remembering. He specifically requested form the factory something to forget his past and on the the same day, it comes back to haunt him.

"Your leader died." He hissed, turning around to face the bunny who dared come closer. "Lou died. Your Lou broke the day you didn't keep your promise."

Ox freezes. Lou mentioned the promise. He mentioned the promise. Many years ago, a promise had been made and one doll didn't keep his.

_I didn't._

He looks down and is suddenly ashamed. He feels like hypocrite. Quitting this though, he'll never do.

The leader's eyes shined with something Ox remembers. Without anything to stop them, without anything to interrupt them. They can do one thing.

They can live.

Ox finds himself in Lou's arms before both know what is going on. He picks him up and passion shines.

Lou backs into his living room where the curtains are closed. It was good for both parties at the moment.

Silence reigns as Lou Submits it Ox. He trusts him too much in the past and present to reject his advances. They both know one thing.

They both represent _hypocrisy_.

"Sir!" A bit shouts, their eyes open. Ox is shoved off as Lou sits up and adjusts his suit. "It is time to teach the class!"

He nods. "Okay, thank you for telling me."

His smile is fake, Ox doesn't bother telling him that. He knows the leader won't care anyway. But their trances have been broken and they aren't temporary lovers anymore.

Lou mocks bows with a grin. "Well, student. The teacher is going to teach now. So don't try and advance on me again."

Growling resonates, Ox cannot to stand the ego of the blonde, but knows he is right. He cannot do anything in public, nobody can know about this.

"I'm coming."

Lou lets him walk out the door and they state for a second. They both want the same thing, but deny it. Lou sighs and blinks.

He can't think about this now. Not while he had a task to do or he will be punished. He has something called helping others achieve something.

A class is going to be taught.


End file.
